tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-83833252132792785672024-03-12T16:09:28.276-07:00Pitt ReportStories based upon the Pitt improv show by Joshua Dyson. Updates Mondays Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.comBlogger253125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-29123529921126477462017-07-19T16:31:00.000-07:002017-07-20T16:33:24.034-07:00Shit Pitt--Transformation of Terrance<b>Shit Pitt--Sway of the Sweater pt. 6 of 8: Transformation of Terrance</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large; text-align: center;">A</span><span style="text-align: center;"> sweater-less Clementine burst from the tropical forest, carrying a makeshift spear and looking like some sort of wild, white native on the hunt! He arrived at Monica's trailer, after a long desperate run to get to her in time. Clementine feared the worst, as Shithead's promise to eliminate her still played out in his mind!</span><br />
<br />
Clementine walked up to the door of her trailer, unsure of what he'd find. He opened the door and went inside. A quick search revealed no one was there. All Clementine found was Monica's bra and panties--the ones that bound her--laid out on the bed. Clementine sighed in relief. At least she'd escaped them. Then his hope derailed. What if Shithead had already gotten there and kidnapped her?<br />
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"Percy!" What's going on?" Clementine turned to see Jeffrey, the director of Child Castaways, standing in the doorway.<br />
<br />
"It's Monica. Sh-she's gone!"<br />
<br />
"Gone? She's got an 8 AM call! She better not be gone!"<br />
<br />
"You don't understand!" Clementine struggled with whether or not he should tell Jeffrey about what was going on.<br />
<br />
"I sure don't! Lissen, did you hear some gunshots earlier? This part of Tutuila is supposed to be clear for filming!"<br />
<br />
Uh--no. What gunshots?" <br />
<br />
BLAM!<br />
<br />
"THAT gunshot!" Jeffrey turned to leave. "C'mon it came from the beach! If some poachers are hunting on my set I'll prosecute!"<br />
<br />
*******<br />
<br />
"Gragghhh!!" The painful groans of Terrance the Pirate came from inside his yacht cabin bathroom. Shithead was at work applying the vestige of shit from Clementine's sweater to his new chosen Shitling! In the next room, Monica lay naked and sprawled out on a wooden table, with rope binding her arms and legs to it. Across her mouth still rested a piece of the living shit from Shithead's tendril. She shook her head and squirmed her body in protest, but her screams were muffled. <br />
<br />
Peyton was tied up outside on the deck where Terrance had been, and with the same rope. Tape was over his mouth, so that he could not yell out as well. Yet, Shithead had underestimated the problem child, as he was attempting to reach into his back pocket for his knife to cut the ropes!<br />
<br />
Shithead--in the body of Halabaad--stood over Terrance the pirate as he applied the vestige of shit to him. The process was evidently painful as Terrance continued to groan in for several minutes longer before he was silent. Halabaad's body then moved aside, revealing a somewhat different Terrance the Pirate! He was now naked except for a loincloth, his bandanna, and eye patch. He sat on the toilet of his cabin bathroom with his head down and his body hunched forward.<br />
<br />
"Terrance...awaken!" The raspy voice of Shithead called to his new shitling. Terrance's bandanna and eye patch began to stir, glowing with the red energy of the shit! His long hair vanished magically under his white bandanna and was replaced by slithering strings of shit that sprouted outwards. Shit grew out from his eye patch and dropped down onto Terrance's arms, changing them into tendrils of shit resembling Halabaad's! Terrance groaned in pain once more, but it soon faded into an evil laugh as he looked up at his master and smiled!<br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-52324085768497251462017-07-12T03:00:00.000-07:002017-07-20T16:20:58.815-07:00Shit Pitt--Tasting the Tendrils<b>Shit Pitt--Sway of the Sweater pt. 5 of 8: Tasting the Tendrils</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">T</span>he body of Halabaad made its way along the beach, moving towards Terrance the Pirate's yacht. It was the body of Halabaad that moved, but it was the mind of Shithead that directed it! The floating tendril-like turds of the Demon of Defecation emanated from the place where Halabaad's face should have been, signifying his possession of the terrorist. Halabaad clutched the now lifeless sweater of Clementine in one hand and his recently-fired pistol in the other. As the strange amalgam walked on, the two persons within conversed mentally.<br />
<br />
"Oh Master Shithead! I did not see why we let Clementine go at first, but I now realize your plan! Terrance the Pirate, with his past jealously over Clementine's TV status, will make a much better Shitling than the weak Clementine!"<br />
<br />
"Yes, Halabaad! It's true! I was able to observe inside Terrance's mind briefly, and saw that after kidnapping Clementine, Terrance tried to kill him! Such envy and hate within him! He will be very easy to turn to our side! All it will take is the application of the shit taken from Clementine's sweater! Then, with our strength increased, we can free the other Shitlings from the Rebellion's gras--"<br />
<br />
"Master, what is it?" Shithead halted the body of Halabaad as quickly as his sentence.<br />
<br />
"I sense others...aboard the yacht!" Shithead used whatever mental abilities he had to probe further. The floating turds of his face then glowed a deep red and formed the semblance of a smile. "Halabaad! We must hurry! This is even better than I planned!"<br />
<br />
With that, the body of Halabaad began to run towards the yacht!<br />
<br />
*******<br />
<br />
Monica lay flat on the deck of the yacht, taking care to keep her head down in the wake of the gunshots that came from down the beach. She then quickly and violently grabbed Terrance the Pirate by the vest again!<br />
<br />
"Ok, Mr. Pirate! Tell me what the hell's going on! Why is this Shithead shooting up the island and what does Clementine have to do with it?!?"<br />
<br />
Terrance laughed. "I told ya, wench! Shithead wants Clementine back in his service! <br />
Don't worry, he be a different man now! Cowboy reformed him, yarr! Yet, Clementine was a little cuckoo when he was a Shitling! Shithead wants ta bring that side'a him back!"<br />
<br />
Monica shook her head. "Shitling? Cowboy? What kind of fantasy is this? Sounds like one of Jeffrey's bad ideas!"<br />
<br />
"Yarr it be a bad idea if Clementine tries to resist! Which probably be why ya hear all the shootin'!"<br />
<br />
"Peyton! Stay where you are! I'm going to go help Clementine!" Monica lifted herself up from the deck to leave.<br />
Terrance broke in. "Yarr that would be an even more terrible idea, Wench! I should know cuz they don't call me Terrance the Terrible for nothin'! Yarrr!"<br />
<br />
Monica eyed Terrance with annoyance. "Lissen Pirate Man, you're not helping any and your Pirate act is annoying me! Why don't you just shut up and let me think?"<br />
<br />
"Ms Monica!" Peyton yelled down from the roof of the yacht’s cabin.<br />
<br />
"Peyton!! Get down from there! You might get shot!"<br />
<br />
He held a telescope in his hand. "But I gotta try out this cool spyglass I found in the cabin! Guess what?"<br />
<br />
"What, Peyton?" Monica shook her head as she looked up at the problem child.<br />
<br />
"I can see that HalaShitman and he does have a gun! Looks like he's coming back this way, Ms. Monica! If Terrance had a pirate gun, I'd shoot ‘em from here! YARR!!"<br />
<br />
"Oh my God! Peyton, do you see Clementine?!?"<br />
<br />
Peyton turned the frame of the telescope. "Um no, Ms. Monica. It's just Shitface!"<br />
<br />
"Peyton! Language!" <br />
<br />
"Sorry Ms. Monica!"<br />
<br />
Monica looked back towards the beach and could vaguely make out the white-robed Halabaad/Shithead. She worried about Clementine but assumed the worst if he'd been shot. She then looked up at Peyton and realized it was their safety that was most important now. She'd grab Peyton and they'd get off the yacht and find help as quickly as possible!<br />
<br />
BLAM! Before Monica could move another gunshot fired off, following the sound of Peyton...<br />
<br />
"MSSS MONICA! HELLLLLLLLP!!"<br />
<br />
...as he fell of the roof of the cabin and into the sea!<br />
<br />
*********<br />
Clementine rested in the heavy foliage of the Tutuilan forest. Hidden by the tropical trees and bushes, he had escaped the bullets of Halabaad's gun. He had gone a considerable distance, in a direction that was unfamiliar to him. It had not been his intent to go away from direction of the movie set, but if that led Halabaad and Shithead away from Monica and the others then he could rest knowing they were safe. His main concern at the moment though was escaping Shithead and Halabaad and surviving! He refused to submit to Shithead's control again--not after he'd worked so hard regaining himself and now finding a new life with Monica on Tutuila. <br />
<br />
"Monica!" He then remembered the vision Shitehead had shown him of Monica trapped on the bed by her own undergarments!<br />
<br />
"Gotta help her!" Clementine turned to run towards Monica's trailer, also remembering Shithead's promise to send Halabaad to eliminate her if he did not submit to Shithead! His pace quickened with the growing fear in his heart as he prayed he was not too late!<br />
<br />
********<br />
<br />
Monica watched Peyton's fall into the ocean. To her, everything was happening in slow motion. Peyton must have been shot by Halabaad's gunfire, and had been knocked off of the roof of the yacht cabin! Without much thought, she threw off her robe to reveal her naked brown Tutuilan form. Terrance began to yarr, but was cut off as Monica looked back and gritted her teeth like a savage! <br />
<br />
"God, I wish I'd worn a swimsuit!" she thought to herself. "I'd even take those stuck purple panties and bra right now!" She sighed and leapt in after the problem child. She reached him quickly and dragged him to the shore. Once there, she retreated back into the water, to cover her nakedness from the boy.<br />
<br />
"Ms Monica! You saved me!”<br />
<br />
“Peyton, are you okay? Did you get shot?”<br />
<br />
“No, Ms Monica. The blam scared me and I fell! Must’a lost my balance! Why ya hiding in the water?!?" Peyton smirked. "Ms Monica! Are you naked in there?"<br />
<br />
"Peyton, shut up!" Monica lifted her hands to cover her breasts that were beneath the water. "I was concerned about Clementine, and I ran out without thinking! Didn't think you'd be out here!"<br />
<br />
"I got up early and was bored, so I came down to the beach! Then I saw Halashit and the yacht and Mr. Terrance yarr!"<br />
<br />
Monica shook her head. "Please don't do that. Ok, listen to me. We have to get out of here. Follow m--"<br />
<br />
THWAPP! Monica was cut off as a long bulbous tendril appeared between them and wrapped around her neck!<br />
<br />
"Ms Monica!" Peyton looked past her to see the tendril coming from the arm area of Halabaad, who was now standing within a few feet of them. Peyton could smell the tendril and confirmed that...<br />
<br />
"Mistah, you smell like shit!"<br />
<br />
Monica's eyes grew big but before she could tell Peyton "language," another tendril wrapped around her mouth and she shook her head and squirmed as she got a taste of it.<br />
<br />
The raspy voice of Shithead came from the floating turd mass head. "Ahh yes. Taste it, Monica. Taste the tendril of Shithead! Mmm!"<br />
<br />
Monica fought to get free but the tendril was too strong and pulled her naked body out of the water and along the sandy shore, closer and closer towards the Demon of Defecation...<br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><br /></span><b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><i>-<a href="http://www.ebay.com/itm/The-Peeper-14-Comedy-Newsletter-/162552758204?ssPageName=STRK:MESE:IT" target="_blank">The Peeper #14 Comedy Newsletter</a> </i>now available! </span></b><br />
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<b>Mr. Peepers visits the SC State House in search of Nikki Haley!</b><br />
<b>Billy G visits the Riverbanks Zoo!</b><br />
<b>Featuring the first newsletter appearance of the flamboyant Manly Man!</b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-16220441713710864652017-05-17T18:26:00.001-07:002017-05-17T18:29:01.706-07:00New Ink Pitt--Windshield Wondering<b>New Ink Pitt--Rufus' Endowment Results pt. 1 of 6: Windshield Wondering</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">"M</span>OMEEE! WHAT YOU DOIN' IN THERE?!?" Rufus, Rachel's special son, yelled loudly through glass as his face pressed against the minivan's windshield.<br />
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Rachel struggled to find her clothing, as she had just had sex with Lenny the Leprechaun--again--and had fallen asleep with him naked in the front seat of her minivan!<br />
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"MOMEEE! WHAT DAT HANGING OFF YOUR CHEST?!? IT LOOK LIKE...LIKE...LIKE...YOUR BOOBIES!!! WHAHHH!" Rufus' face twisted as he slid his open mouth along the windshield surface and bawled like a baby.<br />
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"I SEE MY MOMEEE'S BOOBIES AND THAT BAD BAD BAD! IT NOT MY FAULT THOUGH!" Rufus then turned his attention to the equally naked Lenny the Leprechaun, eyeing him hatefully as he attempted to press his eyes into the windshield. <br />
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"OW! MY NOSE!" Rufus pulled away from the windshield when he bumped his nose. Lenny giggled and then looked over at Rachel as she scrambled to get her clothing out of the floorboard.<br />
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"Ah Lass! How are ye doin' over there?" Lenny smirked and stood up on the seat, allowing Rachel to see the full length of his 4'3" frame and the full length of his big green dragon as she rose her head up from looking in the floorboard. Her eyes met the green dragon and she couldn't help but smirk back at him, if only for a moment. She then remembered Rufus.<br />
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"Oh Lenny! Oh my God, Lenny! Put this on! Rufus is already freaked out enough from seeing me naked!"<br />
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Rachel threw the item of clothing at Lenny, only to realize it was her panties!<br />
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"Ah Rachel, I'd be happy ta put these on, but furst I might play with them a wee bit! Lenny slipped the panties over his big green dragon, but not in the way they were supposed to. He was about to work them around himself and get some satisfaction, when Rachel pulled them off of him quickly and threw Lenny's green pants over to him.<br />
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"Enough Lenny! Put your pants on!"<br />
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Lenny got partially dressed just in time as Rufus was now over his nose pain and pressed his mouth back against the windshield again.<br />
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"IT LENNY! HE MAKE MOMEEE BE BAD BAD BAD! WHAT HE MAKE YOU DO IN THERE, MOMEE?"<br />
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"Rufus!! Honey, get off the car window!! Mommy was just--playing a game with Lenny!"<br />
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Rufus pressed his face sideways into the windshield, with his cheek squished up against it, making a horrible face.<br />
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"WHAA? A GAME?!? MOMEE I WAN' PLAY TOO!!"<br />
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Lenny giggled as he slipped on his shirt. "Damn retard wants ta play too!"<br />
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Rachel looked angrily at him. "Don't call him that! He's special! Not a retard!" She found her bra and fumbled with it as Rufus continued to stare at them sideways. She finally got it clasped and slipped her panties on as well.<br />
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"No Rufus, you can't! This is--a private game between Mommy and Lenny! It's over now anyway!"<br />
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"OVER? WHAA? I SAD NOW, MOMEE!"<br />
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"I'm sorry honey. You can play next time." Lenny rolled his eyes at that statement.<br />
"Rufus, how are you here? You're supposed to be at your endowment, miles down the road!"<br />
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"I could ask you the same thing, "Sister" Rachel!" Rachel's heart sank as Brother Brad walked up to the car!<br />
Rufus, feeling his mommy's regret, then slid down the windshield mouth first, leaving a trail of saliva behind!<br />
<br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-51251842809816049932017-05-10T15:34:00.000-07:002017-07-20T16:21:25.684-07:00Shit Pitt--Monica on the Yacht <b>Shit Pitt--Sway of the Sweater pt. 4 of 8: Monica on the Yacht </b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">M</span>onica walked onto the beach as the first signs of daylight began to brighten the sky. She looked out towards the ocean and saw Terrance the Pirate's yacht. She was a bit puzzled, as this stretch of Tutuila was deserted and supposed to be closed for the filming of Child Castaways. There were no ports or fishing villages for a good mile, so seeing a yacht there was a bit odd. Intrigued, she decided to take a closer look and hoped that maybe she'd find the missing Clementine.<br />
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The yacht was anchored closely to the shore, close enough that she could walk to it through some water. Monica wished she had brought her swimsuit however, as her robe got wet and slowed her progress towards the boat. She could have disrobed, but she didn't want whoever was on the yacht to see her naked, no matter how much of a native she was! Monica smiled as she thought about how Clementine had already seen most or if not all of her during their lovemaking session! She enjoyed his company a lot, and thought he felt the same way. It would have been unlike him to run off after all that!<br />
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"YARR! WHO GOES THERE?!?" The voice of Peyton "the pirate" rang out across the water as he appeared on the deck of the yacht.<br />
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"Peyton?!? What are you doing up there?" Monica dreaded the answer as she sloshed through the water closer to the boat. No doubt Peyton was up to some mischief yet again.<br />
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"Ms Monica! I-I was just playin' pirate! See?" He pointed to his eye patch and bandanna.<br />
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"Peyton, get off of there--right now!"<br />
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"Aww but Ms Monica--"<br />
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"No excuses!"<br />
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Peyton made a sad face, and when that didn't work, he smirked again. He then laughed and turned to run.<br />
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"Ya gotta catch me first!"<br />
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Monica cursed under her breath as she scrambled to get after the problem child. Her robe was soaked on the edges, making it heavier. She struggled to climb up and board the yacht. Finally, she reached the deck and hoisted herself over.<br />
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"Whew! The prop boats in Child Castaways aren't this difficult!" Monica shook off the slight fatigue from the climb and stood to her feet. As she did, she saw a strange sight. "What the hell?!?" Monica gasped as she looked across the deck to see Terrance the Pirate tied up and gagged.. He bounced around and kept trying to talk. Monica cautiously walked towards him and removed the tape from his mouth.<br />
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"Wench! Whoever ya be, leave my vessel and take the rug rat with ya! Hearken to the words of Terrance the Terrible! Yarr!"<br />
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Monica stared for several seconds before a huge smile came to her lips. She then started laughing!<br />
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"Yarr how dare ya mock Terrance the Pirate?!? If''n I was not trussed up right now, I'd pull out my sword and force ya ta walk the plank! Yarrr!!"<br />
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"Are you for real?" Monica was finally able to stop laughing.<br />
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"Yarr! Land lubber! I'll show ya how real I be, soon as I get loose!"<br />
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"Yarr? Who says that? Isn't that a bit dated? Don't think I ever heard Captain Jack Sparrow say yarr. This has gotta be a joke! Did Jeffrey hire you as a surprise for the movie?"<br />
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Terrance squirmed in his ropes. "Surprise? Jeffery? Movie? Terrance the Terrible knows nothing of these! He does know that he likes to pillage and plunder and a capture the booty!"<br />
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He looked Monica's body up and down as he said "booty" and smirked.<br />
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Before she could respond to his checking her out, she heard gunshots ring out from down the beach. Monica dropped down and yelled for Peyton to stay wherever he was."<br />
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"Yarr that be my captors! Probably got Clementine!"<br />
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Monica crawled over to Terrance and grabbed him by the vest. "What?!? Who's got Clementine?!?"<br />
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The Pirate's eyes grew big. "Calls himself Shithead!"<br />
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Monica smirked. "Shit--head? What kind of name is Shithead? That's more of an insult than a name."<br />
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Terrance shook his head. "Don't matter. Shithead be a very powerful enemy who's seekin' revenge. Used his man, Halabaad, to attack my yacht and take me captive!"<br />
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Monica surveyed the beach and water around them again before turning back to Terrance. "But why?"<br />
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Shithead wants revenge on me and the others who rebelled 'gainst him. Came here ta recapture his other man--Percy Clementine!"<br />
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Monica's eyes grew big in astonishment. "Percy? Working with a kidnapper?!? You talking about Percy Clementine, childrens show host?"<br />
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"Yarr that be the man!" Terrance blurted out as he moved around and worked to untie his hands that were bound behind him. "Me and Percy worked together on Percy's Playtime. He needed a pirate and I got hired since I be a real pirate!"<br />
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Whatever, Buddy!" Monica frowned. "Listen I need you to..." Before Monica could finish her sentence, they heard more gunshots coming from down the beach.<br />
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"Percy!!!" Monica shouted.<br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><br /></span><b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><i>-The Peeper #13 Comedy Newsletter--</i><a href="http://www.ebay.com/itm/The-Peeper-13-Comedy-Newsletter-Breastaurants-Special-/152496843401?ssPageName=STRK:MESE:IT" target="_blank">BREASTAURANT SPECIAL</a> now available! </span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: large;"><a href="http://awertystudio.blogspot.com/2017/02/sketch-cards-of-week.html" target="_blank">Sketch Cards of the Week--50 Shades Darker</a></span></div>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-66813707871942959012017-04-05T18:58:00.001-07:002019-09-19T05:52:39.525-07:00New Ink Pitt--Sidewalk Setup<b>New Ink Pitt--Trodemus: Street Psychic pt. 1 of 6 : Sidewalk Setup </b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">T</span>rodemus awoke with a gasp! It was all a dream! Everything he had experienced--from Belinda lying naked on a table and spending all their money on "Funky Poppers;" to the bizarre meeting with horrifying presidential candidates; to the distasteful comparisons of Trodemus with that strange fictional doctor; to the oversized, cross-dressing girly giant version of Stardust ripping open the Psychic Parlor--had all been a simple nightmare!<br />
<br />
Trodemus moved his head around on something squishy. He raised his hand and felt a familiar sensation. He opened his eyes and saw that his head rested not on a pillow, but upon one of the fat thighs of Belinda, his Lady Love and Cherished Chubby! Trodemus smiled a wicked smile and started to run his hand up and down Belinda's voluptuous leg. He wasn't sure how they'd ended up in this position but he was sure it would lead up to some serious lovemaking between them yet again! <br />
<br />
Suddenly, Belinda shifted and Trodemus' hand slid off her huge thigh. Instead of their bed, Trodemus felt grass! He then slid his hand a few inches more to find the cold, uncaring feel of the sidewalk! Trodemus' eyes grew big. He thought the nightmare was over. He then heard Belinda above him, sniffling.<br />
<br />
"Ohh Troddie!"<br />
<br />
Trodemus looked up to see his lady love in tears, but looking wonderful in her sexy red corset! Trodemus realized he was also fully clothed in his black robe. He then slid up off of Belinda's large leg to comfort her.<br />
<br />
"Belinda! Why are you crying?"<br />
<br />
Belinda opened her eyes as tears rolled down her pudgy cheeks and looked deeply with desperation at her man.<br />
<br />
"I-It's the Parlor! We've been kicked out!"<br />
<br />
Trodemus grabbed Belinda by her rotund arms and got a bit excited feeling those curves! He shifted lustful thoughts aside to further figure out the situation.<br />
<br />
"What do you mean? What's happened to the parlor? Why are we on the street?”<br />
<br />
Belinda pulled a tissue from her corset and blew her nose. Trodemus cringed at the honking sound.<br />
<br />
"S-Stardust--he kicked us out! We're locked out of the parlor and the yard now that we didn't pay him the $250,000!"<br />
<br />
Trodemus grimaced. "How do you know this? How did we end up on the street? The last thing I remember was being in bed with you, and then I had a horrible nightmare about Stardust destroying the Psychic Parl-- Wait! Is it still there?!?” Trodemus looked up at the white picket fence that surrounded the Psychic Parlor grounds. He stood up and looked over to see that the Psychic Parlor, and the adjoining Bingo Hall were still there!<br />
<br />
"Troddie, all I remember was going to bed with you too in the Parlor. I woke up to find us out here, sleeping on the sidewalk! I tried to get through the fence, but I couldn't find the entrance!"<br />
<br />
Trodemus' brow furrowed. "No entrance? Where did our gate go?" He looked both ways along the fence and saw nothing.<br />
<br />
"I don't know Honey! It's just...gone!" Belinda then started crying again as Trodemus hugged her up.<br />
<br />
A passerby walked along the sidewalk up to them.<br />
<br />
"Hey are you folks okay?" Trodemus looked up at the person and saw the face of Stardust! He was wearing a sparkly jogging suit sweater with a short skirt as he ran in place.<br />
<br />
"YOU!" Trodemus shouted and made a leap for the Star-Crossed Cross dresser! He was unable to make contact though, as Stardust's body became translucent, sending Trodemus flying right through!<br />
<br />
"Yes! It's me! Stardust! The SOLE PROPRIETOR--of the New Ink Pitt, and your former Psychic Parlor!"<br />
<br />
"You told me that in my dream!" Trodemus raised himself up from the street.<br />
<br />
"Huh?" Stardust looked puzzled.<br />
<br />
"You came up the Psychic Parlor as this big girly giant and you told us that you were the Sole Proprietor and then you tore down the whole place!"<br />
<br />
Stardust rolled his eyes like he didn't know what to think. He then looked back at Trodemus. "Trodemus--you are a beautiful young man--but I think you've got a wild imagination! I didn't have anything to do with any dream!" He then turned and giggled, revealing a translucent sparkly to do list that said:<br />
<br />
Subjects to make Trodemus dream of to make him upset:<br />
1. Belinda spending too much money<br />
2. Politicians<br />
3. Giant Girly Stardust!<br />
4. Ripping up the Psychic Parlor<br />
<br />
He then slid the list back into his dress, and somewhere down in his crotch area before turning around to face Trodemus again. His body became totally visible again.<br />
<br />
"Okay, so I had a little to do with the dream! It was just in good fun and not real!"<br />
<br />
Trodemus gritted his teeth in anger. <br />
<br />
"It truly was all a dream, but this right now--it's not! Belinda was correct. I transported you out onto the street during your distracting dream and have now barred you from re-entry! Until you are able to come up with the $250,000 to pay for the Psychic Parlor, you no longer have a home!"<br />
<br />
"Bah! How do you propose that we make money with no Psychic Parlor? Trodemus and his secretary need an establishment from which we can ply our wares!"<br />
<br />
Stardust smiled. "You have this sidewalk and any sidewalk within the area! Surely the great Trodemus: Psychic of Doom can draw money from anywhere! A Sidewalk Setup sounds like an even better way to bring in customers being that you'll be visible to all passersby!"<br />
<br />
With that, Stardust in his girly jogging suit disappeared, leaving Trodemus and Belinda to contemplate their fate.<br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-42001634896829453382017-03-29T18:57:00.003-07:002017-07-20T16:21:35.355-07:00Shit Pitt--Peyton the Pirate<b>Shit Pitt--Sway of the Sweater pt. 3 of 8: Peyton the Pirate</b><br />
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<br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">P</span>eyton the problem child rambled through the trees towards the beach. The cantankerous child was up to no good yet again as he spotted a yacht that had pulled up on shore right before day break. He had watched and waited to see who would get off the boat. Peyton thought he was dreaming when he saw a weird man in a white Middle Eastern style robe exit the yacht and walk down the beach. Had Jeffrey secretly hired some new actor? Closer examination of the man's face revealed that he didn't have a face at all! In place of his face where these free-floating shapes that looked like turds!<br />
<br />
"Ewwww! Turd face!" Peyton said under his breath.<br />
<br />
The figure was clearly the now-possessed Halabaad, showing the face of Shithead, though Peyton was not aware of any of that. He assumed it was some mask and that Jeffrey was most likely going to use this guy as a surprise to scare all the kids in Child Castaways! Peyton got an idea and then smirked. He'd make sure that that Jeffrey would be the one who'd be surprised as he made his way to the yacht!<br />
<br />
***<br />
A naked Monica stood over her bed, still looking down at her bra and panties, which had bound her to her bed up until a few moments before.<br />
<br />
"What the hell happened last night?!?" She reached down and picked up her bra and then dropped it back down on the bed, waiting for something happen. When nothing stirred, she sighed in relief.<br />
<br />
"Man, what did I have to drink last night?" <br />
<br />
She then went from room to room in her cabin, looking for Clementine. He was nowhere to be found, so she slipped on her robe and went outside and looked around. When her search found nothing, she decided to make her way out to beach. Dawn was approaching, so maybe she'd find Clementine out there in the morning light.<br />
<br />
***<br />
<br />
Back at the yacht, Peyton made his way onto the deck, only to find Terrance the Pirate tied up and gagged in a corner!<br />
<br />
"Heyyy Mistah! Oh wow! You're a PIRATE!!!" Peyton yelled excitedly.<br />
<br />
Terrance shook his head and said "MMFF MMFF MMFF" with a fervor that clearly said to "Shut up!" It was clear that Terrance didn't want the Shithead-possessed Halabaad coming back and capturing Peyton too. Of course Peyton didn't understand, and thought that Terrance was playing Pirate with someone.<br />
<br />
"Where are the other pirates, Mistah? You must be the bad pirate if they got you tied up! Should have left somebody ta watch you!"<br />
<br />
Peyton then walked over and took Terrance's eye patch and bandanna, putting them both them both on his own head. He then looked back at Terrance and smiled.<br />
<br />
"Not ta worry Mistah Bad Pirate! Peyton the Pirate is here ta keep an eye on ya! YARRRR!!!"<br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-5719450469597585072017-03-19T17:06:00.000-07:002017-03-19T17:13:08.874-07:00New Ink Pitt--Raunchy Rachel<b>New Ink Pitt--St. Patty’s Day Sinner pt. 2: Raunchy Rachel</b><br />
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<br />
<span style="font-size: x-large;">R</span>achel eyed the tall stein of green beer on the table in front of her as she contemplated St. Patrick's Day. As a good Mormon woman, she knew she should abstain from alcohol, but it looked so good! She had realized that if she was going to be in a relationship with Lenny the Leprechaun, then a bit of partying was required! So she licked her lips and reached for the stein, quickly turning it up and chugging it all down like an Irishman! <br />
<br />
Rachel then slammed the empty stein down on the table and let out a huge burp! The room looked fuzzy but she felt really good. She tried to stand up but was a bit wobbly, and fell into another woman who was walking by. The woman shoved her and Rachel took offense, letting out a series of cuss words that she didn't even know she had in her! Rachel argued with the woman for a moment but was then led away by Lenny, who rushed in to save her!<br />
<br />
"Well Rachel, I see ye've finally come around to me lifestyle!"<br />
<br />
Rachel drunkenly tried to speak. "L-Lenny...you're s-s-so cute! Weshould go and have sex somewheres later hehe!"<br />
<br />
Lenny smirked. "I won't argue with ye there, Lass! Ye are so sexy right now!"<br />
<br />
"Whhat? Me? Sexy? I'm not sexy, but these are!"<br />
<br />
Rachel pulled her top off and exposed her breasts to the entire pub they were in! The Mormon Mommy was really starting to loosen up after that drink! She then got up on the bar and the rest of her outfit was visible. She was wearing a green skirt, fishnets, and high heels! She stood up on top of the bar, topless and began dancing! Her red hair flowed as she shook her head side to side and moved to the sounds of Irish music. The pub attendees started clapping and cheering as Rachel began to take off the rest of her clothes! She slid her green skirt down her long legs to reveal green panties. As she bent over, she turned her butt towards Lenny and smiled at him! She then threw her dress onto the lecherous leprechaun's face, followed by her panties! Lenny sniffed them and winked at her. Rachel stood up again, and was now completely naked except for her green fishnet stockings and high heels! She continued dancing, but with more provocative movements as she lifted her arms up and squatted down. Someone from the crowd yelled out, wanting to know where her pole was. Rachel smirked and looked down at Lenny. The leprechaun looked deviously back at his lady and then jumped onto the bar with her! He then slid down his pants and everyone then knew where Rachel's pole was! Rachel giggled and prepared to work her pole...in a number of ways...but before she could she awoke from her dream to the sound of Rufus yelling at Lenny from the outside of the mini van! She looked up to see her Special Son laying on the windshield with his face pressed into the glass asking "Wenny" what he was doing in there with his mommy!<br />
<br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-76919200342297708022017-02-22T08:21:00.000-08:002017-02-23T08:40:35.807-08:00Peepers' Pitt--President Peepings & the Opposite Pitt<b>Peepers' Pitt--Costume's Charge pt. 6 of 6 : President Peepings & the Opposite Pitt</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">M</span>r. Peepers stood in awe at the strange suited man who looked exactly like him! The man had just risen up from a leather chair and walked out from behind his desk. As he moved away, white light was evident around his suit. In the next moment, the man's suit had shifted into a somewhat more otherworldly outfit! This suited version of Mr. Peepers went from a regular business suit to a studded gray jacket with a white shirt and boots. A belt with the Mr. Peepers eyeball motif appeared around his waist and the collar of his shirt became black with the eyeball in the center as well. This "President Peepings" then walked up to Mr. Peepers with hand outstretched for a handshake.<br />
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"Welcome, Mr. Peepers. It's great to finally meet you."<br />
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Peepers looked at the outstretched hand in distrust. "Peepers not know what going on here, or how you get Peepers' face, but Peepers say you and funny suit get out of Peepers way, NOW!"<br />
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"It's okay, Peepers. We mean you no harm. We're all friends here." Peepers looked past President Peepings at Glademus. <br />
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"Glademus no friend of Peepers! He and fat girlfriend mess with Peepers and his Pitt! He probably play another trick on Peepers by make him hallucinate and see imaginary twin! Peepers have enough, Glademus!"<br />
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Glademus stood up and giggled. "It's no trick this time, Peepers. President Peepings is real!"<br />
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"Glademus crazy! Why he lie about funny Peepers look-alike? What purpose it serve?!?"<br />
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"No lies. Just like I am an alternate version of your universe's Trodemus, Prophet of Doom, President Peepings is an alternate reality version of you! You have teleported into my universe...THE OPPOSITE PITT!"<br />
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"Peepers not care because he have power to stop Glademus now!" The laser wands in his suit slid out quickly and Peepers raised them up and pointed them at the Prophet of Optimism! Before he could act a burst of white light filled the room, knocking Mr. Peepers off his feet! The white light had come from President Peepings glasses! Mr. Peepers lay on the floor unmoving.<br />
<br />
"Now, rise up Mr. Peepers!" President Peepings commanded as Mr. Peepers suddenly stood to his feet! "Now you are under my control! For the first time, you are the victim of your very own strobe effect that exists in our special glasses!"<br />
<br />
Mr. Peepers stood motionless, awaiting the next command of President Peepings... <br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: large;"><a href="http://awertystudio.blogspot.com/2017/02/sketch-cards-of-week.html" target="_blank">Sketch Cards of the Week--50 Shades Darker</a></span></div>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-49647034661514626822017-02-15T20:03:00.000-08:002017-02-15T20:12:53.483-08:00Peepers' Pitt--President Peepings Preview<b>Peepers' Pitt--President Peepings Preview</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">L</span>ast time in <a href="https://pittreport.blogspot.com/2016/11/peepers-pitt-firefight-in-lab.html" target="_blank">Costume's Charge pt. 5</a>, Mr. Peepers activated teleportation powers in his new costume. He escaped the Pittians, but found himself inside an oval office, facing Glademus and a suited gentlemen who looked similar to Mr. Peepers. The gentleman's name is Peepings...President Peepings! Who is he and why does he have Mr. Peepers' face? What does this have to do with Glademus and the Whitespace power? Find out next week, Wednesday February 22, 2017 in Costume's Charge pt. 6! For now, take a look at my costume design for President Peepings!<br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><br /></span><b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><i>-The Peeper #12 Comedy Newsletter--</i>NSFW VALENTINE'S DAY SPECIAL now available!</span></b><br />
<b><a href="http://www.ebay.com/itm/The-Peeper-12-Comedy-Newsletter-/152433727505?ssPageName=STRK:MESE:IT" style="color: #cc0000;" target="_blank">Print Version</a><span style="color: #cc0000;">---</span>$1.99</b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">$5.00 For Mature Readers.</span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-66735473937556872292017-02-08T18:18:00.000-08:002017-02-11T09:01:38.274-08:00New Ink Pitt--Stardust: Sole Proprietor<b>New Ink Pitt--Trodemus: Psychic Supreme pt. 3 of 3 : Stardust: Sole Proprietor</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">T</span>rodemus stood ready on the top of his bed as the roof of his Psychic Parlor of Doom was ripped off, revealing the sparkly yellow and white face of the now giant Stardust! Belinda had stopped screaming and now gasped as she looked over at her man.<br />
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"Troddie! Your cloak!" Belinda smirked as she realized Trodemus had jumped out of bed so quickly he'd forgotten he was naked. She held the covers close to her own naked body and jumped out of bed to grab Trodemus' cloak from a nearby coat hanger.<br />
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"Worry not Belinda! Trodemus will do it." With that the Prophet of Doom waved his hand and the cloak was telekinetically lifted from the hanger and floated to it's place on his body. Enveloped by his trademark black cloak, Trodemus was ready to do battle with the giant Stardust! Belinda giggled at seeing her man all naked and still unafraid to take charge! No doubt there would be a bedroom scene to follow that their reality show could not film yet again!<br />
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"Stardust! Why do you disturb Trodemus of Doom in his home, and what do you hope to accomplish by ripping it apart?!?"<br />
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The huge hand of Stardust finished ripping off the roof and appeared to set it aside on the ground. Now the full gigantic head of Stardust was visible, including his frilly reddish-orange bush that passed for hair! He smiled a great smile and then spoke.<br />
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25"Trodemus! What a beautiful man you are...when you have no clothes! A perfect form to play dress up with! My mind races with all the possibilities!" He then inhaled a great big breath and giggled.<br />
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"Answer me, Stardust! What are you doing here and how did you get so large?!?"<br />
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"Oh Trodemus. I'm the proprietor of this Pitt, which means I'm all-powerful here! I can just blow myself up anytime I feel like it! Figured it was a great way to let you know I mean business about you paying me for the Psychic Parlor of Doom! It's been a week since I let you know, and you've had plenty of time to worry about your finances in general with the "haunting" I put you through! I'm here to inform you it's time to pay up or you're out of here!"<br />
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"Pay for what?" Trodemus scowled up at Stardust. "You just knocked thousands of dollars off this place by removing the roof! What kind of landlord are you?"<br />
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"Ooo NO NO NO!" The booming voice of Stardust was loud yet at the same time a deep whisper. "I am NOT a landlord! I prefer SOLE PROPRIETOR! Such a beautiful title!" He then cocked his huge head sideways and sucked in what seemed like all the air from the sky! He then exhaled and caused a powerful wind that shook the entire psychic parlor! Belinda and Trodemus ran for cover downstairs as the rest of their bedroom and the entire second floor flew apart! Belinda screamed as Trodemus grabbed her by her plump arm and pulled her down the stairs. The wind continued and the walls of the first floor began to shake.<br />
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"Bah! The damned fool is destroying the Psychic Parlor! Hurry Belinda! We have to get out!"<br />
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Trodemus and his Cherished Chubby made it out the front door mere moments before what remained of the Psychic Parlor was blown off the ground it rested on and off into the air! Trodemus and Belinda huddled together on the ground as the giant Stardust walked over to them...<br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-4634791700054633472017-01-17T05:00:00.000-08:002017-01-17T05:34:52.573-08:00New Ink Pitt--Making Trodemus Great Again<b>New Ink Pitt--Trodemus: Psychic Supreme pt. 2 of 3: Making Trodemus Great Again</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">T</span>rodemus angrily attempted to get off the ceiling. His whole bedroom had been turned upside down, or at least he was, as he was the one on the ceiling and Belinda was still on the table below. His efforts were distracted for a moment as he looked down at his now totally naked cherished chubby Belinda laid out on the table. He admired her beauty, visually tracing every roll of her curvy body. His body have been upside down, but at least one part of him was now standing upright!<br />
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"Ahem!" came the voice of the bald woman in the business suit who just entered the room from a portal in the side of the wall. "Are you finished admiring your lady? She's really lovely, and I'm happy for you but I'm only female you should be paying attention to at the moment!"<br />
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Trodemus glared at the bald woman in disdain. "Bah! Trodemus has no time for you! He is not interested in skinny women with bald heads! Now begone so Trodemus can figure out what is going on here with Belinda, his money, and the Funky Poppers!"<br />
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The bald woman gasped. "Wow! There you go with your body shaming! Guess you've been brainwashed by my competition! Going to be tough to get your vote...of confidence, but I'm gonna give it a try!"<br />
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Trodemus gritted his teeth in anger. "Woman, who are you and why do you keep babbling to Trodemus of Doom?!?"<br />
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The bald woman put her hands on her hips. "Well fella, my name is Hillary and I'm here to help you out of your financial problems!"<br />
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Trodemus squinted in distrust. "What would you know of Trodemus' financial problems?"<br />
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Hillary smiled and waved her hand across her body in front of her. Her business suit became a monk type jacket one wore in a monastery. "Everything! The floating glass followed by the haunting of your finances, on up to your current Psychic Parlor of Doom situation!"<br />
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"H-How do you know this?" Doom stammered but wasn't sold yet.<br />
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"Well I'm something of a guru--just don't ask me to send any e-mails!" Hillary then smiled a toothy grin for 30 seconds as she eyed Trodemus for some sort of acknowledgement of her greatness.<br />
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"What? Why do you look at Trodemus like a woman stuck at climax?"<br />
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Hillary broke the grin and frowned. "This is the part where you're supposed to get down on your knees like a broken man and tell me to teach you!"<br />
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Trodemus looked puzzled. "Teach me what?"<br />
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"Aren't you trying to become a doctor?"<br />
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"Huh? Trodemus is a psychic and has no desire to become a doctor!"<br />
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Hillary looked disappointed. "Well that is a bit...strange. Could have sworn you were a sorcerer who wanted to become a doctor. Or was it the other way around?"<br />
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Trodemus groaned and held his head. "Woman, you are making the Prophet of Doom sick! State your business plainly so he can get right side up again and back to his Belinda!"<br />
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"Oh all right! I can help your financial situation! All you have to do is vote for me as..."<br />
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Before Hillary could finish, an older man in a suit with a red tie and bad hairdo popped out of the portal! He floated up beside Hillary and surveyed the entire room with squinty eyes and a slightly open mouth.<br />
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"Now you listen here, Trodemus!" The man spoke. "You don't have to vote for Hillary because no man should have to take orders from a woman! Sure she's flashy and is well-liked by most of the voters, but only the Donald can make the Trodemus great again! Vote for me...and you'll not only be a great psychic with lots of money, but you'll be Trodemus: Psychic Supreme!"<br />
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Trodemus just shook his head in confusion. Despite all he'd seen and experienced as the Prophet of Doom, this scenario was perhaps the weirdest ever! Before he could react, Hillary and Donald began fighting it out right in front of him! Hillary slapped Donald and then Donald punched Hillary! The two went back and forth while floating in the air, until a strong wind came out of the portal and sucked them both back in! The portal then disappeared in a flash of light and when Trodemus opened his eyes again, he was upright and back in his bed! Belinda was no longer naked on a table in the middle of the room, but lying asleep right beside him. Trodemus, groaned and Belinda awakened.<br />
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"What's wrong, Troddie?"<br />
"Nothing Belinda. Just a bad dream...with politics!"<br />
"Gotta stop watching network news before bed then Hon!"<br />
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Doom stared at his bedroom, which was normal and not full of Funky Poppers. He sighed and lay back down. He was just about to drift off when a scratching sound was heard from the ceiling. The sound increased, and appeared to be coming from all sides. The scratching then became a ripping sound. Trodemus sat up in bed again just in time to see the entire roof of his Psychic Parlor of Doom get ripped off by the hand of a giant Stardust!! Belinda screamed as Trodemus gritted his teeth in anger!<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin: 0px;">
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;"><i>The Peeper #11 Comedy Newsletter--</i></span></b><b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;">2016 Comic Convention Special </span></b><b><span style="color: #cc0000; font-size: large;">Now Available!</span></b><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-70609398187258176662016-11-30T16:38:00.000-08:002016-12-25T08:20:50.876-08:00Shit Pitt--Betram meets the Turkey Man<b>Shit Pitt--Shit War pt. 19.5 of 20 : Betram meets the Turkey Man</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">B</span>etram Bunny laid down on his bed and prepared to go to sleep. The Bisexual Bunny who was always looking for love had finally been relieved of the huge stomach upset he experienced from eating Shithead! Originally, Betram had brought the Demon of Defecation into the Shit Pitt (as it became known) by reciting from a book of Leprechaun magic while using the toilet! So it was his duty to return Shithead to his world the same way he had entered--through Betram's ass! Things had gone wrong though, and there was concern that Betram would pass Shithead and he would be reborn! Resident magician, Johnny Pizazz, then stepped in and opened up a portal inside Betram that sent Shithead back to his home dimension.*<br />
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With his stomach one more at peace, Betram could focus on the other part of his body that had problems--his face! Horribly disfigured by the evil Dr. Dyson, Betram's face was still an odd mass of stretched skin and fur. Betram felt sadness as he lay on his bed and thought about his looks. How would anyone ever love him with a face like the one he had? He began to cry as he drifted off to sleep. Suddenly, Betram was aware of a strange noise outside his window. He listened closely with his bunny ears and identified the sound as an "erk erk erk" noise. He dismissed it some of the Cowboy's chickens running around, but it was already dark out and they should all be roosting for the night. <br />
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<b>ERK ERK ERK ERK</b> came the noise as it got louder and seemed to be getting closer.<br />
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<b>ERK ERK ERK GOOLA GOOLA GOOLA</b><br />
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Betram rose up in his bed at the familar sound. <br />
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"Ahu ahu" Betram giggled. "That sounds like a turkey!"<br />
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<b>ERK ERK ERK GOOLA GOOLA GOOLA TAP TAP</b><br />
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Betram looked towards his window towards the tapping sound just in time to see a turkey shaped head with beak tapping the window!<br />
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"Ohh it is a turkey ahu ahu! Didn't know the Cowboy had any! Maybe he needs a good shooin' to send him off ta bed ahu ahu!"<br />
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Before Betram could move, the turkey began tapping the window harder and harder with its beak in between "goolas" and "erks!" The tapping got so fast and violent that the glass began to break. Betram was horrified! What was wrong with this turkey?<br />
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"Go away! ahu ahu! You got the wrong guy! I'm a bunny rabbit! I don't eat meat and I don't even like Thanksgiving!"<br />
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Betram's cries went unheeded, and with one last "goola goola" the turkey cracked a hole in the window and then broke the whole thing by throwing it's body through it! It came crashing into Betram's room screeching and puffing it feathers up like some dominant beast! Betram looked closer to see something was not right with this turkey. The Bisexual Bunny's eyes grew big as he saw that on each side of the turkey, where the feathers are, that there were also two manlike arms! This Turkey "Man" then turned its attention to Betram! It stared at him for a moment before leaping up into the air and landing on his bed!<br />
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"Oh no! Don't huwt me! I'm just a silly bunny man! ahu ahu," Betram pleaded. <br />
<br />
The Turkey Man let out another erk erk erk that changed into something sounding like a scream. Betram tried to hide under the covers, but could not take his eyes off the horror before him! The Turkey Man** appeared to be struggling with something. He erked and pranced around a bit and then squatted and screamed repeatedly. Finally the whole frightening scene ended with a<br />
<br />
<b>SPLUTCH!</b><br />
<br />
The Turkey Man then leapt off of Betram's bed and out the window, leaving behind a large egg, coated with unknown body fluid and fecal matter. Betram just sat there in disbelief...<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>*Read</b> <a href="http://pittreport.blogspot.com/2010/12/pitt-report-shit-in-betrams-stomach.html">http://pittreport.blogspot.com/2010/12/pitt-report-shit-in-betrams-stomach.html</a><br />
<b>**Origin of the Turkey Man</b> <a href="http://classicpittreport.blogspot.com/2010/11/special-thanksgiving-story-turkey-man.html">http://classicpittreport.blogspot.com/2010/11/special-thanksgiving-story-turkey-man.html</a><br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Purchase </span><i>Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace </i>Season 1! <span style="color: #cc0000;"> </span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-30433979561733314112016-11-26T19:39:00.001-08:002017-01-01T05:53:15.726-08:00Donate January!As a thank you for everyone that has supported me or read my blog over the last few years, I'm offering the <b>Mr. Peepers meets the Hands of Time</b> postcard for a donation of any amount! Just look over to the right of your screen where the sidebar is, and scroll down to <b>Donate</b>! Click the <b>Donate </b>button. Please include your name and address so I can mail out the postcard to you!<br />
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<br />Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-86253452509243144902016-11-09T16:49:00.001-08:002016-11-09T16:49:25.851-08:00Peepers' Pitt--Firefight in the Lab<b>Peepers' Pitt--Costume's Charge pt. 5 of 6 : Firefight in the Lab</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">P</span>eepers fired multiple bursts of energy from his laser wands, turning back the Pittians from their attempt to capture him!<br />
<br />
"FIRE!" Peepers yelled repeatedly as the lasers shot off in the direction of the Pittians.<br />
<br />
"Not exactly what I had in mind." A voice spoke to Glademus as he watched the firefight unfold between Mr. Peepers and the Pittians.<br />
<br />
"Well, he seems to be adapting well. Hopefully the gray experience has humbled him enough to use this version of the power more responsibly." Glademus sat in a chair next to an executive desk while watching Peepers on the view screen. Behind the desk, in a leather chair, sat the person he spoke to. They were inside a large office that was circular in shape. On the ceiling was a familiar shape that glared down at them. The room was filled with the finest furniture and looked like a very important place.<br />
<br />
Back in the Tinkerer's lab, Peepers was firing lasers all over the place, and the Pittians could do nothing to reach him! Suddenly, the room filled with gray smoke!<br />
<br />
"Choo Choo!!" Peepers yelled. "What you think you doing?" Peepers struggled to see as the smoke filled the lab and the opening to the maze before him.<br />
<br />
"Hey guy!" An odd man in a dress shirt and tie appeared out of the smoke in front of Mr. Peepers. "Don't worry, I can help you out of here!"<br />
<br />
"Who you and where you come from?" Peepers questioned.<br />
<br />
"I'm just a regular guy! Here to help!"<br />
<br />
Peepers' new glasses automatically scanned the man to reveal his true form. A pumpkin head appeared in place of the regular guy face!<br />
<br />
"Charlie Decaye! You not fool Peepers with new face! Get out Peepers' way before he blast you!"<br />
<br />
Female hands slid across Peepers' shoulders and down his chest, followed by arms and the smell of too much perfume. Peepers pulled away and turned.<br />
<br />
"Lucy! Stay away from Peepers with dirty hands!"<br />
<br />
"Aww c'mon Peepers baby! My hands ain't dirty!" She held up her hands and flashed her long fingernails while pushing out her hips sexily.<br />
<br />
"Peepers glasses detect otherwise! Fingers show residue of interaction with hoo ha, and everybody know Lucy #1 Ho with the #1 dirtiest hoo ha!"<br />
<br />
"Why you--" Lucy went to slap Mr. Peepers but the giant ho slapping hand of Jervas Clinkscales did it for her! He slapped Mr. Peepers from behind, almost sending him to the ground!<br />
<br />
"That'll teach ya not ta talk junk 'bout mah #1 ho! You gon ‘pologize for ever calling her hoo ha dirty!"<br />
<br />
Peepers laughed. "Clinkscales? What happen to hands? Did Lucy give you infection with her dirty hoo ha?"<br />
<br />
"Don't you laugh at me! Yeah mah hands look funny but I know how ta use 'em real good! Gonna use 'em to pimp slap you all over the place!"<br />
<br />
Before Peepers could move, the muscular arms of Boris the Russian solider wrapped around him, and held him in place! His strength was incredible, having been increased by his earlier interaction with Mr. Peepers.<br />
<br />
"I've got him, Comrade Jervas!" <br />
<br />
Jervas rubbed his giant hands together and smiled. He was ready to give Mr. Peepers a good smacking! <br />
<br />
BRANG! Peepers activated his invulnerability again and his personal force field pushed Jervas back and caused Boris to lose his grip! Peepers ran through the smoke to escape them, and knocked over Humphrey Hobo on his way! The impact of the force field knocked the hunchback hobo out! Peepers' glasses had detected the lab exit through the smoke, and was directing Peepers. He was almost out and back into the maze when he heard a loud pitched yell that nearly deafened him! Van Punker appeared and started playing air guitar, which now actually produced sound! The air guitar sound was joined by his amplified yell. His air guitar power actually sounded like an entire rock band! Peepers had no time to ponder it as he quickly fired his lasers at Van Punker and ended the catastrophic concert before it got out of hand! Peepers missed the rocker, who jumped out of the way.<br />
<br />
Peepers exited the lab and went into the maze leaving the gray smoke behind. The entire maze was now visible as he started to run down it. Before he could go a few steps though, the EMT man appeared! The EMT man looked crazier than ever, and the EMT letters on his forehead were glowing! He ran up to Peepers and headbutted him! Peepers was knocked back a bit, but his force field held, and caused the EMT man to be blown backwards and off his feet! Peepers then ran past the EMT man down the maze. He turned briefly to fire his lasers into the roof of the maze, which brought down mortar and many mechanical parts between him and his pursuers! Peepers giggled and continued down the maze.<br />
<br />
VRRRPPP!! VRRRPPP! Peepers tripped and fell as two giant coils wrapped around both his legs. He looked up to see the Mad Tinkerer with his robot! The robot had shot the coils out of its arms, and was slowly reeling Peepers closer to him.<br />
<br />
"Forgot about us, didn't you? Well the game is over, Mr. Peepers!" The Mad Tinkerer scoffed. "My scientific mind has defeated that strange suit of yours! Now Glademus has to send us home!"<br />
<br />
Mr. Peepers frantically scrolled the screen of his glasses with his eyes, searching for a method of escape. He then saw a menu entitled “ESCAPE.” Peepers saw the word “TELEPORT” and activated it! Peepers said “teleport,” and the world around him began to fade in a red light. He could faintly hear the voice of the Mad Tinkerer as he struggled to find a way to stop what was happening. Everything around Peepers then disappeared into a red nothingness! The redness grew and grew until it finally reached a climax. It then quickly flew away to reveal another environment! Peepers looked to find himself in an oval office! Before him sat Glademus and a man in a black suit and white tie behind an executive desk. The man was also wearing glasses, which were identical to Mr. Peepers' original ones. Mr. Peepers realized the man looked exactly like him! The man rose to his feet and spoke.<br />
<br />
"Welcome Peepers. I am President Peepings!"<br />
<div>
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
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<br /></div>
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Purchase </span><i>Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace </i>Season 1! <span style="color: #cc0000;"> </span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-91418051312524201942016-11-07T04:00:00.000-08:002016-11-07T18:39:00.375-08:00New Ink Pitt--Cash-Covered Curves and Collecting<b>New Ink Pitt--Trodemus: Psychic Supreme pt. 1 of 3: Cash-Covered Curves <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">&</span> Collecting</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">"O</span>hh Troddie! We're rich baby! Rich!"<br />
<br />
Trodemus, Prophet of Doom opened his eyes to the sound of his Cherished Chubby, Belinda! He arose from his Bed of Doom to see her lying naked on a table in the middle of their bedroom! <br />
<br />
"Belinda? What is the meaning of this? Why are you lying naked without the presence of Doom upon you?"<br />
<br />
Belinda raised her curvaceous body up off the table and Trodemus saw that she had been laying on money that had been spread out on the table beneath her!<br />
<br />
"It's your money, Troddie! I love it!" Belinda then began to roll her enormous sweaty body all over the table, rubbing herself across the money and laughing. Green 100 dollar bills pressed up against her large breasts, belly, thighs and butt and flattened until they stuck! She was left with a body full of cash-covered curves!<br />
<br />
"Belinda! What are you doing? The Prophet of Doom enjoys all your sexy games but that is my money you are rolling your big ass on! Reserve your curves for your man!"<br />
<br />
Belinda refused to listen and rolled up a few 100 dollar bills and moved them down to her crotch area!<br />
<br />
"Oooo Troddie! Oooo your money gets me hot!"<br />
<br />
Trodemus was at first appalled, but then smirked as he watched his large lady love pleasure herself with his finances! It was oddly gratifying!<br />
<br />
Suddenly the sound of a doorbell was heard, followed by a strange popping sound. Before anyone could move to answer the door, one appeared in the wall across from Trodemus and Belinda! The door then flew open to reveal strange beings with oversized rounded heads and impossibly small bodies. The all had round dark eyes and made a popping noise. Trodemus stared in fright as the creatures ran for Belinda! <br />
<br />
"Belinda! Stay away from her!!" Trodemus yelled from his bed. The creatures leapt up onto the table with Belinda and began to pull the money off of her body!<br />
<br />
"Stop! What are you foul creatures doing to my beautiful Belinda?!? Begone!"<br />
<br />
Belinda laughed as one of the creatures peeled a 100 dollar bill from her breast. "Hey, that tickles! It's okay Troddie! They aren't foul, they're funky!<br />
<br />
Trodemus glared. "Funky?"<br />
<br />
Belinda giggled. "Yeah! They're called Funky Poppers! It's because of the popping sound they make and because well, they're funky!"<br />
<br />
"Trodemus does not care what they are, he just wants to know why they are here touching his lady love and taking his money!"<br />
<br />
"Well they get the money because I bought them!" Belinda twisted her curves to allow the little Funky Poppers to get several bills out from under her rolls.<br />
<br />
"What are you saying? Did you squander the finances of Doom again?!?<br />
<br />
Belinda smiled and picked up one of the Funky Poppers. "I spent it all Troddie--on these little guys! Aren't they cute?"<br />
<br />
"Bah! They hardly resemble anything human! Such funky body types are very unrealistic and not at all appealing to Trodemus of Doom! You are telling me that you've gone and got yourself a collecting habit?"<br />
<br />
"Umm...yeah! It really is a habit too! I bought one and then I had to have more! I kept buying until I got all you see here!" The room had filled with what appeared to be hundreds of Funky Poppers!<br />
<br />
Trodemus groaned. "And how much did they cost you?"<br />
<br />
"Well they were different prices, but I got most of them around $75 each!"<br />
<br />
Doom put both hands to his head in pain over such a financial loss! That is when the room began to turn upside down, and he suddenly found himself on the ceiling while Belinda was below him on what appeared to be the floor. Trodemus tried to reach Belinda or get her attention but he could not. She appeared to be frozen in place and did not respond.<br />
<br />
"What...is going on now? Trodemus demands an answer!"<br />
<br />
The wall across from him suddenly swirled as a circular rush of energy expanded into some sort of portal! Out of the portal stepped a bald headed woman in a business suit.<br />
<br />
"Oh Trodemus, what if I told you this reality is one that's miniature? If you want to make your reality bigger you gotta change your hairstyle! We can be stronger together if you're with me!"<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Purchase </span><i>Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace </i>Season 1! <span style="color: #cc0000;"> </span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">$2.99 plus shipping! For Mature Readers.</span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-12867900839246804962016-10-12T18:02:00.001-07:002016-11-05T09:18:22.355-07:00Peepers' Pitt--Costume Charged<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Peepers' Pitt--pt. 4 of 6 : Costume Charged</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">P</span>eepers' world was red and beeping! His red glasses were now active as the beeping continued and more information scrolled before his eyes. The terms "laser wands" and "invulnerability field" remained on the screen, with a cursor above them. Peepers stared at "laser wands" and the words became highlighted. The word "activate" appeared beside it. Peepers assumed that speaking would activate them and he was right! He said "yes" and out of the cuffs of his costume slid two wands with spheres on the tips. They extended for about 10 inches and stopped. The words "laser wands ready" and the question "fire?" appeared on the screen. Peepers lifted one arm and pointed towards the wall across from him. Choo Choo stepped aside quickly.<br />
<br />
"Fire!" Peepers commanded and a red laser beam shot out from the sphere at the end of the wand. Unfortunately, the laser wand on the other cuff fired as well. The force of the laser hitting the wall blew Peepers back and the force of the lowered laser hit the floor, sending Peepers flying slightly through the air! Peepers flight was broken by the wall, but he landed unhurt as he rolled with the impact and slid down to the floor.<br />
<br />
"Laser surprise Peepers! Must get better control!" With that, Peepers began pointing and firing all over the Mad Tinkerer's lab! "Just need practice! Peepers like! Hehe!" He took a few shots in Choo Choo's direction and had the old railroad man hopping around like a youngster!<br />
<br />
"Choo Choo look like crazy chicken bouncing around!" Peepers giggled at how much fun he was having! <br />
<br />
"SQUAAAAAWWWWWWK!" The sound of Birdy Nok Nok filled the lab as the bird man quickly flew out of the maze and into the lab. He was headed straight for Peepers!<br />
Peepers quickly highlighted "invulnerability field" and activated it. A glowing energy field sprang up around him with a loud "BRANNG" sound! Birdy ran right into it and was knocked backwards!<br />
<br />
"Peepers...invulnerable! It almost like being godlike again!" He then looked over at the fallen Birdy Nok Nok. "Surprise, Birdy! Now it time for Peepers to make his escape!" Peepers turned to run down the maze, but was cut off by the appearance of the Pittians, led by the Mad Tinkerer!<br />
<br />
"We've got you now Peepers," the Tinkerer declared.<br />
<br />
"That what you think!" Peepers activated his laser wands once more and held them at ready.<br />
<br />
Elsewhere, Glademus stood in front of a large viewscreen, watching everything play out.<br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-56023463468872589422016-10-03T18:28:00.004-07:002017-07-20T16:21:48.770-07:00Shit Pitt--Sweater's Release<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Shit Pitt--Sway of the Sweater pt. 2 of 8: Sweater's Release</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">"A</span>hh! Uhh! Unggh!" Monica moaned in frustration as she moved her half-naked body in an attempt to escape the bra that bound her to her bed! She had tried everything to get free, but her bra was bound by an invisible force and was too tight to slip out of. The clasps were unreachable since she lay on her back. <br />
<br />
"Damn, why don't I own a front clasping bra?!?"<br />
<br />
Monica then tried to squeeze her womanly assets from the bra cups but it was rather painful and she realized that even if she got them free, the rest of her would still be stuck!<br />
<br />
Monica shook her head. "No way this body is gonna slip out of that small space!" She dropped her head back on her pillow and sighed. She then attempted to roll to her side and was shocked to realize that the bra had suddenly been released!<br />
<br />
"Well...isn't that something?" Monica lifted herself off the bed and was suddenly aware of her undergarments spread all over the bed. "What the hell happened last night?!?"<br />
<br />
*****<br />
<br />
"Hulluhulluhulla!! Dea to de traitor! Dea to merican fashoon! Dea to dis sweater," came the muffled protests of Halabaad from somewhere beneath his sweater-wrapped head. The floating poo face of Shithead was nowhere to be seen as the blue sweater now covered the entire thing! Yet, though he was buried, Shithead was not gone! The Demon of Defecation rose up to silence Halabaad in his anger.<br />
<br />
"You will do no such thing!" The voice of Shithead spoke clearly and loudly, unaffected by the physical wrappings of the sweater. "There will be no death to the sweater so long as my sweater shit exists within it!"<br />
<br />
Halabaad questioned Shithead telepathically so that his words would be clear. "But Master, it betrayed us! The sweater released Clementine and now it attacks us!"<br />
<br />
"Calm yourself, Halabaad. The sweater acts independently apart from my full reclaim of my shit properties. It merely acted on it's original purpose...to protect Clementine from all harm. However, its decision to attach itself to you has put it back in contact with its master! Now I can easily absorb the sweater shit back into myself, leaving a lifeless inanimate object behind!"<br />
<br />
With that the sweater suddenly lost all hold on the head of Halabaad and fell down to the sand like the normal sweater that it was. <br />
<br />
"Master! Where is Clementine?!? The floating turd head of Shithead was once more visible and spun around quickly to locate him. They spotted Clementine making his way towards the trees.<br />
<br />
"Stop him!" Shithead ordered. Halabaad reached into his robe and pulled out a pistol which he fired quickly and recklessly. The bullet whizzed past Clementine as he ducked behind a tree.<br />
<br />
"Graggh! He escapes!" Halabaad fired off a few more shots but was unable to properly target him as Clementine disappeared in the foliage of the forest.<br />
<br />
"No matter." Shithead sighed. "We came here to get my sweater shit, not Clementine."<br />
<br />
"But Master! Did you not desire to have him in your service once more?"<br />
<br />
Shithead's turds paused their movement for a second as if the Demon of Defecation actually felt concern for the loss of a Shitling. "Clementine is lost to us for now but we have no time to involve ourselves here." The body of Halabaad then reached down and lifted up the sweater. "With this in our grasp though, we may see him again! We have what we came for and it will certainly work on another Shitling just as well! The image of the bound Terrance the Pirate flashed through the joined mind of Shithead/Halabaad as they both laughed.<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are © 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></strong><strong><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></strong></div>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-20578977184315022982016-09-07T18:08:00.004-07:002016-09-07T18:08:42.306-07:00Peeper's Pitt--Countdown to the Charge<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Peepers' Pitt--Costume's Charge pt. 3 of 6: Countdown to the Charge</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">T</span>he Mad Tinkerer and the rest of the Pittians found Birdy Nok Nok outside the building, still bent over and pecking around on the ground for imaginary seeds. The Tinkerer slid up a sleeve of his white lab coat to reveal an odd wristwatch.<br />
<br />
"Where'd ya get that?" The Tinkerer gasped as the gravely voice of Charlie Decaye came from behind him.<br />
<br />
"It's something I built after Glademus shared more information on how Peepers uses hypnosis against his opponents. His regular glasses emit a strobe effect that cause a person to go into a state that makes them suggestive to hypnotic commands. One feature of this wristwatch counteracts his strobe."<br />
<br />
The wristwatch buzzed as the Tinkerer walked up to Birdy Nok Nok. <br />
<br />
"What's that?" Charlie Decaye was full of questions, like the good census worker he was.<br />
<br />
The Tinkerer held the watch up to his face. "Somehow, Peepers was able to hypnotize Birdy here without the glasses. The wristwatch detects it."<br />
<br />
Charlie frowned. "You mean this isn't his normal state? Sure had me fooled!"<br />
<br />
The Tinkerer turned a knob on the watch and a frequency that only Birdy could hear was released. The Bird Man suddenly raised himself up and looked around frantically in birdlike fashion!<br />
<br />
"Squawwk! Squawwk!" Birdy went nuts, evidently realizing the seeds he spent all that time pecking for were not real! He took one look at the Pittians, then leapt from the ground and flew into the building that held the Tinkerer's lab!<br />
<br />
"Where's he going?" Decaye questioned yet again.<br />
<br />
"He's probably headed for Peepers! C'mon Pittians! Follow Birdy!"<br />
<br />
<br />
Choo Choo Andrews talked and talked and talked as he told the story of his entire life! Peepers cringed as Andrews told him every little detail about his life as a child and how he got interested in trains. Peepers eyed the display in the wrist of his costume and smiled. There was only 20 seconds left for the costume's charge! A whirring sound was heard within the wall and then a female voice started the countdown at 5 seconds!<br />
<br />
"5" Peepers smiled as Choo Choo looked around for the voice.<br />
"4" The whirring of the wall traveled down closer to where Peepers was attached.<br />
"3" The whirring stopped at his back and a thump was heard.<br />
"2" Air released from either side of Peepers as he felt himself being pushed out.<br />
"1" The lab filled with white smoke that blocked Peepers from Choo Choo's view.<br />
<br />
Peepers emerged from the smoke with his costume fully charged and dramatically altered! The center eyeball design of the gray costume had now gone red with energy and the corners of the eye had expanded outwards to the shoulders in a stripe pattern! Red stripes of energy ran from the chest area and out to arms. All the white areas had gone red and the gray...the gray was gone! Peepers smiled to see that this newly-altered costume felt a lot like his original since it was black!<br />
<br />
Suddenly, a beeping sound came from his glasses. Peepers' looked through his red glasses to realize they were operating as a display to some sort of computer system built into the costume! Phrases like "laser wands" and "invulnerability field" popped up on the screen. Peepers grinned in delight! He had finally gotten a <b>serious</b> upgrade! <br />
<br />
<br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-80412571122329551082016-08-17T18:43:00.000-07:002017-07-20T16:22:02.822-07:00Shit Pitt--Sweater's Sway<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Shit Pitt--Sway of the Sweater pt. 1 of 8: Sweater's Sway</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">C</span>lementine watched as the red bubble of energy that separated him from the ocean rose. The pitch blackness faded to once more reveal the blue green water. As the bubble drew nearer to the surface, light was once more visible. Clementine looked up through the quickly diminishing water to see the light of the morning sun. Finally, the bubble made it to the surface. Clementine could see the sky above and the island of Tutuila right in front of him! The bubble was somewhat offshore, but began moving quickly towards the island. Clementine was beginning to make out a figure standing on the island. His heart sank as he knew it to be the form of Halabaad, who was possessed by Shithead! It was only a matter of time before he'd be possessed too! His sweater was back on, and once Shithead came in contact with it, the shit within its fibers would take Clementine over!<br />
<br />
The bubble slid up onto the shore and promptly "burst," knocking Clementine off his feet and leaving him a bit startled! Halabaad then approached him, only it wasn't Halabaad! Where his face should have been beneath his headpiece, there was only Shithead! Shithead's "face" manifested itself visually they same way it did when his physical form was <a href="http://pittreport.blogspot.com/2010/12/pitt-report-end-of-shithead.html" target="_blank">actually there</a>--as a mass of floating turds that appeared connected at the facial end! Clementine was disgusted! The only blessing was that there was no smell accompanying the sight! The Demon of Defecation wasn't known for being the best-smelling villain around!<br />
<br />
"Clementine!" Shithead's raspy voice came from Halabaad. "Now you shall embrace the sweater shit and once more do my bidding!!" Shithead raised Halabaad's arms, as if he was about to cast some sort of spell on Clementine.<br />
<br />
"HALALALALALALALA!"<br />
<br />
"Silence Halabaad!" Shithead coughed through Halabaad's non-visible mouth and the floating turds bounced around from the air released.<br />
<br />
"Sorry, Master Shithead!" Halabaad's voice came from wherever his mouth was hiding.<br />
<br />
Shithead cleared Halabaad's throat with a raspy grunt. "I know you are eager to see Clementine defeated but your terrorist war cry is not necessary!"<br />
<br />
"Forgive me, Master," came the voice of Halabaad. With that, Shithead turned his attention back to Clementine, but before he could act, Clementine's sweater had leapt off of its owner and was flying through the air right at them! It quickly and violently wrapped itself around the face of Shithead/Halabaad!<br />
<br />
"Wahhh!!" The raspy voice of Shithead screamed as the sleeves of the sweater clasped the head of Halabaad and held on tightly!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></strong>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></strong>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-10070353865713491582016-08-15T18:58:00.001-07:002016-08-15T19:15:07.086-07:00Peepers' Pitt--Choo Choo & the Stupid Pecker<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Peepers' Pitt--Costume's Charge 2 of 6: Choo Choo & the Stupid Pecker</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">C</span>hoo Choo Andrews hovered forward over the ground, on his way to capture Mr. Peepers in the Mad Tinkerer's lab! He stood with his arms down beside him, as he moved at an incredible pace through the air! Andrews was amazed at his speed, and marveled at the passing colors and textures of the ground, which had become a blur to him! The only thing he disliked about his new power was that he now had dark smoke coming out of his mouth! He wasn't sure why or how it happened, but he was pretty sure it was a way for Glademus to play a joke on the old railroad man! That didn't matter now though. The most important thing was finding Mr. Peepers so he could get home! He looked up and saw the Tinkerer's lab becoming visible in the distance!<br />
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Choo Choo hovered close to the entrance of the lab, and found Birdy Nok Nok outside, walking around like a chicken with his feathers up and his head pecking the ground! Choo Choo looked closer, and realized that Birdy was pecking nothing but dirt! Evidently, Peepers had used some more mind trickery on the poor bird man to make him think there were seeds or some other food he liked on the ground. Choo Choo yelled at Birdy to try and get his attention, but he just kept pecking away! Choo Choo tried a few other things, like snapping his fingers and clapping his hands, but got no results. He then put a hand on Birdy's shoulder, and the bird man flapped a wing, throwing Andrews across the ground!<br />
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"Stupid pecker!!!" Choo Choo cussed as he gathered himself up again.<br />
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He decided to leave Birdy alone for now. He certainly had no love for the bird man, since his wild behavior had almost gotten him killed when he caused their fall from the <a href="http://pittreport.blogspot.com/2012/04/peepers-pitt-levitating-locomotive.html" target="_blank">levitating locomotive</a> before Glademus saved them. Andrews had better things to do than try and snap the bird man out of his state! Besides, there was no real way to tell if he was under hypnosis, or just acting crazy like before! Choo Choo walked up to the door of the Mad Tinkerer's lab. Luckily, he had gotten the special keys from the Mad Tinkerer before leaving the city! He entered, but did not anticipate the maze he found! In order to cover more ground quickly, he decided to use his hovering ability to quickly explore each direction the maze took! Unfortunately, he didn't realize he'd find the right direction so quickly, and he ran into the Tinkerer's robots!<br />
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Mr. Peepers frowned as he squirmed in his charging trap. 35 minutes was taking too long, and instead of fighting him, Choo Choo Andrews had decided on torture, by telling Peepers the story of how he got there!<br />
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"Peepers not care how Choo Choo get here and then feel sorry for 'stupid pecker,' Birdy Nok Nok! You annoy Peepers with long story!"<br />
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Choo Choo laughed. "Aww I'm glad you enjoyed my story Peepers!" He sat on a plastic five gallon bucket he'd found in the lab. "Might have ta tell you another!"<br />
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Peepers gritted his teeth. "No! Peepers not want to hear anymore!"<br />
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"C'mon Peepers! I've got lots of experience and that's what ya want, right? All ya had ta do was ask! Maybe I'll tell ya my life story!"<br />
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Peepers shook his head and looked down at his wrist display. 20 minutes had now past. He did not have that much longer for his costume's charge, but the arrival of the Pittians outside made it more important that ever that the charging get done quickly so he could get away!<br />
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Outside, The Mad Tinkerer landed their jet as the Pittians got out and prepared to enter the building. <br />
<br />
<b style="color: #cc0000;">NEXT: CLEMENTINE'S CHOICE</b><br />
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<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-45971364686700756972016-08-03T18:55:00.000-07:002016-08-03T18:55:16.533-07:00Peepers' Pitt--Affixed Fight<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Peepers' Pitt--Costume's Charge pt. 1 of 6: Affixed Fight</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">M</span>r. Peepers grumbled. 35 minutes?!? He was going to have to wait 35 minutes, suspended to the giant wall charger before he could even access the power of his new costume! He'd gone through so much already, like the escape from the Pittians in town and his flight on the back of bird man Birdy Nok Nok! It also had been no easy task to get through that ridiculous maze that he didn't create on his way to the Tinkerer's lab! This giant wall charger was just another stupid step in Glademus' insane stipulations that had begun with Peepers' "Gray Experience." Peepers was beginning to think the costume had no power at all, and the whole thing was just a cruel prank Glademus was playing on him after Peepers took his Whitespace power and used it to create his own universe!<br />
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Peepers looked down at the wrist screen within his sleeve. 10 minutes had past, so he wouldn't have to wait that much longer. <br />
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Suddenly, he heard a sound coming from the maze. Peepers looked over to see Choo Choo Andrews stumble into the lab! The railroad man was looking worse for wear, after his flying collision with the two robots!<br />
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"Peepers! I...got you...now!" Andrews slowly made his way towards Peepers.<br />
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"Choo Choo look terrible! Did he get run over by train? Oh wait--he is train! Glademus give you power and make you go WOOT WOOT like little train engine!"<br />
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Choo Choo growled. "Why you--! I oughta...koff koff!" Andrews waved his hand in the air to clear out the smoke that came out of his mouth.<br />
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"Choo Choo really should give up smoking! It bad for you!" Peepers giggled.<br />
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"Lissen here, Young Man! Don you go insultin' your elders! I been on the railroad a long time and I could prob'ly teach ya a thing or two!"<br />
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"Yes it true! Age of Choo Choo is one reason Peepers bring him to his Peepers' Pitt! Choo Choo have much experience and live long time! How old you now...75?"<br />
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"Hey!" Choo Choo gathered himself up and made his way towards Peepers. Peepers squirmed a little, but waited to for Choo Choo to get close. He then kicked the railroad man backwards with his two feet! Choo Choo fell down on his behind!<br />
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"Dammit! Ya done knocked me on my backside, but I ain't done with ya yet!" Choo Choo then stumbled over to Peepers again and attempted to slap him! Peepers blocked it with his arm!<br />
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"Choo Choo forgetful! Just because Peepers' back affixed to wall, it not mean he not able to use arms and legs!" Peepers then poked Choo Choo in the eyes and pushed him back.<br />
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"Stay away from Peepers! He not like close contact with someone who smell like coal!"<br />
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Choo Choo shook off the poke and then glared at Peepers with a smile. "It don' matter! Don' gotta fight ya! All I gotta do is wait here until the other Pittians arrive and then we've won! Glademus said if we caught you then he'd send us all home! Don' look like you goin' anywhere for a while! How the hell ya get stuck to the wall like that anyway?"<br />
<br />
Before he could answer, the sound of a jet engine was heard overhead. Outside, the new jet built by the Pittians and the Mad Tinkerer had arrived!<br />
<br />
<b style="color: #cc0000;">NEXT: SWEATER'S HOLD</b><br />
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<br /></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Purchase </span><i>Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace </i>Season 1! <span style="color: #cc0000;"> </span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">$2.99 plus shipping! For Mature Readers.</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;"><br /></span></b>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-70933725881408987952016-07-20T09:00:00.000-07:002016-07-24T06:57:48.366-07:00Shit Pitt--Story of the Sweater<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Shit Pitt--The Sweater Story pt. 6 of 6: Story of the Sweater</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">M</span>onica awoke to find Clementine gone! After their night of passion, the two had fallen asleep in her bed. The last thing she remembered was Clementine's arms wrapped around her as they spooned. She moved her arm and felt the empty pillow where Clementine had rested his head. Monica sighed and suddenly realized something else. They had both fallen asleep naked, so how was it that she was now wearing her bra and panties? She got another surprise when she attempted to get up out of bed. No matter how hard she tried, she could not lift herself up! After a few moments she realized that her bra and panties were somehow holding her to the bed, as if they were attached to the mattress! Monica could not figure out how this was possible. She struggled and managed to slip out of her underwear. With her legs free, she kicked and twisted but could not get her upper torso free from her bra. She was unable to reach the back fasteners, since that area was pinned to the mattress by some unseen force! Monica moved her bare legs and bottom in a futile kickfest that produced no results.<br />
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Mr. Clementine's eyes fluttered open to a blue-green world all around him. The cool embrace of water pressed up against his skin, and he realized his whole body was adrift...underwater! He gasped for breath only to have his mouth fill with salt water! He was in the ocean again, and drowning, just like the day when Terrance the Pirate had forced him over the edge and down to the depths! He'd never quite figured out how he'd survived that, and then to awaken on the island of Tutuila, to the lovely sight of Monica, the Tutuilan native actress! Monica! He was in bed with her after their lovemaking! How did he get here? Clementine tried to hold what breath he had left and determined that he would once more escape his watery fate. He attempted to swim upwards, towards what he thought was the light of the sky above him. He assumed it was morning from the look of things. He swam towards it, but to his horror, the light was suddenly...shut off! It was now pitch black where the light had been, and Clementine had to turn back because he could not see anything! He retreated to the blue-green area and frantically looked for some sign of daylight elsewhere. He began to panic as he could no longer hold his breath and prepared to breathe out and accept his fate.<br />
<br />
Suddenly, a light appeared, but not from anywhere around him. Clementine looked down to see he had his sweater on and it was now glowing red with energy! In his confusion, he had not paid any attention to what he was wearing. After his lovemaking with Monica, he really wasn't supposed to be wearing anything! Yet there it was, glowing brighter and brighter with red energy. Clementine grew frightened, wondering what was about to happen next. The red energy grew to a climax and then seemed to explode out into the water! Clementine was unharmed. On the contrary, he had been saved! A red bubble of energy now surrounded him. He took a breath and realized there was air in the bubble! Clementine sighed in relief and took a few moments to gather himself.<br />
<br />
He could not rest long as the sweater suddenly forced Clementine's arms up and worked its way off of his body! It then flew over to the other side of the bubble and floated in the air. <br />
<br />
"Oh my God! It's true! My sweater!! Y-you're alive?!" Clementine was both astonished and puzzled that this sweater he'd had for years was now somehow acting on its own!<br />
<br />
"H-how is this possible?"<br />
<br />
The blue sweater glowed red again and suddenly two eyes and a mouth appeared in it. It began a raspy laugh that chilled Clementine to the bone.<br />
<br />
"Anything is possible for...SHITHEAD!" The raspy voice that spoke from the sweater needed no introduction. It was clear that it was the Demon of Defecation, Shithead! Clementine's heart sank in horror as it brought back memories of him being a servant of Shithead, as one of the Shitlings!<br />
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"Hello Clementine!" the raspy voice of Shithead seemed to fill the whole bubble with fear. Clementine had to force himself to find the words to interact with him.<br />
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"But you're dead! The Rebellion killed you!"<br />
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Shithead laughed yet again. "Oh you mean when Betram ate me up? He did get rid of me, yes, but he only sent me back to my home dimension! My Shitworld is so much better than your little Pitt, but I rule everything here already, and I seek new places to conquer! I have yet to fully take your dimension but despite my little...setback...I made sure I'd get another chance!"<br />
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"What do you mean?" Clementine grew curious.<br />
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"Well, Betram didn't get all of me! He didn't see the vestiges of myself that I left within your sweater and within the headpiece of the only Shitling to escape the Rebellion--Halabaad the terrorist! <br />
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"So that explains Peyton's Sweater story!" Clementine exclaimed. "My sweater isn't alive...it's just being animated by you!"<br />
<br />
"Oh but it is alive! It is very much sentinent, but it is still my servant! I fashioned the Sweatershit to lie dormant until I got to you via Halabaad or if your life was at risk."<br />
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"When Terrance tried to drown you in the ocean, the Sweatershit activated on its own, and saved your life! It has been acting independently ever since, though within my orders. Due to it's limited power without my presence, it had to get creative. It manipulated your new lady friend somewhat with a quickly-pushed bedroom distraction that allowed it to get you here!"<br />
<br />
"You were supposed to free the other Shitlings once I activated your Sweatershit in the Cowboy's jail, but your pirate friend complicated things! He certainly does hate you! Took us a while to get to him but now...see for yourself!"<br />
<br />
An image appeared next to the floating sweater. In it Clementine saw Terrance the Pirate tied up on his pirate yacht, with Halabaad the Terrorist standing over him!<br />
<br />
"I just let him know, through Halabaad, who's in charge! Figured you might want to deal with him, once I arrive on Tutulia and make it possible for you to fully embrace the Sweatershit!"<br />
<br />
"No!" Clementine protested. "I won't serve you again!"<br />
<br />
Shithead laughed. "Oh, but you will! I've taken steps to see that you do!" The image then switched to show the half-naked Monica still fastened by her bra to her bed. "The Sweatershit's interaction with Monica's undergarments gave them some power. She is unable to move and quite trapped! If you do not embrace the Sweatershit, I will have Halabaad go and eliminate her!"<br />
<br />
Clementine sighed. "Don't hurt her!! I-I'll do what you ask!"<br />
<br />
"Very good, Clementine! I knew you'd see it my way! It has been a long chase, but it will be over once I arrive with Halabaad on Tutuila! You will embrace the Sweatershit and it will take total control of you! Percy Clementine, my Shitling you were, and my Shitling you will be once again!" Shithead then laughed as Clementine felt hopeless.<br />
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<br /></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-86614824855152361732016-06-29T19:19:00.001-07:002016-06-29T19:19:40.564-07:00Peepers' Pitt--The Charger<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Peepers' Pitt--A MAZE ing Adventure pt. 6 of 6: The Charger</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">M</span>r. Peepers tore through the Tinker's Lab desperately looking for any sign of the charger for his new costume! He rummaged through a tool box full of nuts, bolts, screws, and lots of mechanical parts with no luck. <br />
<br />
"Where Glademus hide charger? Peepers want it...NOW!" He then looked up and scanned the room with his red glasses, which wasn't very helpful in the darkened lab.<br />
Peepers then saw something on the wall. There was a schematic drawing of what appeared to be his costume, and below it, a machine with a lever. Peepers closely studied the diagram and concluded that pulling the lever would reveal the charger! He assumed that it would be something he could hold in his hand and plug into the costume...somewhere. He ran his fingers along his costume in search a receptacle in which the charger could be plugged in, but couldn't find anything. Frustrated, Peepers finally went ahead and pulled the lever!<br />
<br />
The machine fired up and made a humming sound. Around him, the walls of the lab seemed to be alive with energy! The next instant, Peepers was aware of something happening at the back of his costume! He reached back and felt two previously unseen projections coming out of the costume, around his shoulder blade area! Peepers realized they were metal and from the shape of them, that they were life-sized electrical blades like that of an electrical plug!<br />
<br />
"Charger not plug into costume! Costume plug into charger, evidently! Peepers have bad feeling about this!"<br />
<br />
Suddenly, the whirring sound of moving machinery came from the wall. A panel slid away to reveal a two-slotted socket that matched Peepers' costume blades. Peepers gasped as magnetic force suddenly pulled him backwards! The costume then automatically plugged into the wall socket, with Peepers held there against the wall!<br />
A small screen then appeared on the wrist of Peepers' costume sleeve, that read...COSTUME CHARGING...TIME TO FULL CHARGE: 35 MINUTES.<br />
<br />
<b style="color: #cc0000;">NEXT: THE STORY OF THE SWEATER</b><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-68693132605499284242016-06-22T20:02:00.001-07:002016-06-22T20:02:25.412-07:00Shit Pitt--Fashion Fling<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Shit Pitt--The Sweater Story pt. 5 of 6: Fashion Fling</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">"O</span>h Percy you were so great!" Monica put her arm around Clementine as they walked back to her trailer after a long day of filming Child Castaways.<br />
<br />
"Thanks Monica." Clementine responded to Monica's sudden embrace with awkwardness at first, but a smile formed on his face as he became more comfortable with it. She slid her arm around his back in a slight hug, and then pulled it back and around his arm. A few moments later and she was holding hands with him. Clementine felt a tingle of love and a surge of lust as his thoughts began racing about holding the beautiful Monica in his arms and having his way with her. She'd made it pretty obvious that she was interested in him. Clementine could feel that it was just a matter of time, and that that time could be fast approaching!<br />
<br />
Upon arriving at her trailer, the two walked in. Clementine sat down on the couch while Monica once again slid out of her clothes! She lifted the traditional Tutulian dress costume over her head, revealing her spandex shorts and top. She then sat down beside Percy, who wore a white t-shirt and shorts.<br />
<br />
"Percy, you really did do great today! You're great with the kids and you execute your lines so much better than Fred!" She placed a hand on his leg.<br />
<br />
"Well, I just did my best. I'm not a big-time actor" Clementine humbly stated.<br />
<br />
Monica's eyes glistened. "But you could be! Percy, this movie could be your big break! Aww you're so modest! I like that about a man." <br />
<br />
She then smiled and cut her eyes sexily at him. "Percy, I --<br />
<br />
"Yes Monica?" Clementine looked into her eyes and almost got lost in the beauty.<br />
<br />
We've only known each other for a short while, but I want you to know that I really enjoy your company." She was then silent for a few awkward moments. <br />
<br />
Percy spoke up. "I enjoy being with you too, Monica! Great working with you out there!" Clementine then mentally kicked himself for saying something so stupid. It was clear she wanted him but he kept messing it up! <br />
<br />
"Oh." Monica's smile faded and then brightened up again, but only slightly. "I enjoy...working...with you too." She then got up from the couch.<br />
<br />
"Um...I guess I better go take a shower." She then walked into her bedroom. Clementine got up and followed, but before he could say anything, he saw Monica standing in her bedroom and looking at her undergarments spread out on the bed! She seemed a bit concerned at first, but then she got a huge smile on her face! She turned to Percy, walked over and kissed him!"<br />
<br />
"Monica...mmff," Clementine struggled to get the words out as Monica's passionate kisses overtook him. His words were taken out of his mouth but there was no more need to communicate since it was clear that now was the time for action!<br />
<br />
<br />
Monica backed away from him for a moment to lift her shirt and reveal her lovely Tutulian breasts, which left Clementine stunned! She then lay back on the bed and Clementine joined her. Clementine wondered why Monica had been staring at all her intimate items on the bed but didn't think it was unusual for them to be there since women are always trying on and taking things off in search of the right outfit to wear. The only thoughts on his mind now were those of lovemaking as he got on top of Monica and met her passion with his own in a heated entanglement that left them oblivious to the world around them.<br />
<br />
In a corner behind them, Mr. Clementine's sweater rose up and floated.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<br /></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Purchase </span><i>Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace </i>Season 1! <span style="color: #cc0000;"> </span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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Joshua Dysonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02928560763309418564noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8383325213279278567.post-38828806037690604162016-06-08T18:04:00.001-07:002016-06-08T18:04:34.925-07:00Peepers' Pitt--End of the Maze<div style="margin: 0px;">
<b>Peepers' Pitt--A MAZE ing Adventure pt. 5 of 6: End of the Maze</b><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">M</span>r. Peepers clenched his teeth as he held his fingers in his ears. The robots' sirens grew louder as they rolled down the mechanical maze after him. Peepers was at a loss of what to do at this point, and the noise was making it impossible to come up with any profound strategy to stop them. He finally acted on instinct, grabbing a metal pipe on the wall of the mechanical maze!<br />
<br />
"Peepers stop stupid noisy robots," he thought. "even if he have to whack them!"<br />
<br />
Unfortunately, the pipe was attached to the wall, and Peepers had no way of cutting it off. He began kicking it but still couldn't get it to budge.<br />
<br />
"Stupid pipe! Peepers not like! Why you welded to wall?!?"<br />
<br />
Suddenly, a much louder sound, like that of a horn, filled the mechanical maze. Smoke then filled the passageway, which Peepers used to make his escape further down the maze away from the robots. As he pressed closely against the wall, he saw Choo Choo Andrews, speeding through the air, releasing the smoke from his mouth and making the horn sounds between puffs!<br />
<br />
"Railroad man look crazy!" Peepers giggled to himself. "Glademus play really big joke on him by give him power to become living train! It only good to make lot of noise and big mess!"<br />
Choo Choo was moving so fast that he did not have time to stop himself, and with the smoke filling up the maze, it was really hard to see what was in front of him. Peepers heard one last blare of the horn, followed by a loud crash! After that there was silence. Peepers walked through the smoke to find Choo Choo laid out on the floor, and in front of him, the two robots overturned and out of commission! Peepers quickly made his way past them and further down the maze, where he found...the end of the maze! He left the mechanical confines of the maze and entered a large room that he knew was the Tinker's Lab!<br />
<br />
<b style="color: #cc0000;">NEXT: FASHION FLING</b><br />
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<br /></div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are (C) 2016 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><br /></strong><strong>All characters appearing in this work</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">are fictitious. Any resemblance to real</span></strong><br />
<div>
<strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental</span></strong><br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Purchase </span><i>Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace </i>Season 1! <span style="color: #cc0000;"> </span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip</span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!</span></b><br />
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