Peepers Pitt--Levitating Locomotive

Peepers’ Pitt--New Crew Askew pt. 7 of 20: “Levitating Locomotive”

Choo Choo Andrews lunged forward with his arms outstretched. The railroad man had awakened to find himself on board a moving train--with Birdy Nok Nok in tow! The bird man was squawking and trying to fly inside the railroad car! Andrews was now attempting to catch him. His lunged proved unsuccessful, as Birdy leapt up and to the other side of the railroad car, near the doorway! Choo Choo gathered himself and prepared to make another attempt. Birdy just leapt out of his reach again and continued squawking! Andrews decided he needed to take another approach. Before he could do anything however, something caught his eye. He looked outside the window of the railroad car door, and saw something white and puffy! Choo Choo wiped his eyes and looked again. Was he really seeing…CLOUDS? He pressed up against the window and got a closer look. There was only one railroad car--the one they were in--and all around them were clouds! The railroad car was moving all by itself, as it FLEW THROUGH THE SKY!!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Peepers Pitt--Cold Calisthenics

Peepers’ Pitt--New Crew Askew pt. 6 of 20: “Cold Calisthenics ”

Unbelievable! That’s what it was! Humphrey the Hunchback Hobo could not believe what he was seeing! Boris the Russian solider, unaffected by the cold of the snowy plain, was now RUNNING IN PLACE!

The man was clearly insane! At least that is what Humphrey thought as Boris continued his exercise. Since he was unable to find any work on the empty, snowy plain, the disciplined solider decided to prevent muscle atrophy by working his body! Large flakes of snow pounded into Boris, and the bitter cold grew more evident with the increasing wind. Boris would not be swayed from his work however, as he continued running in place for a space of 30 minutes! Humphrey felt tired FOR him, and would have laid down and gone to sleep after watching the first ten minutes of Boris’ pacing. He could not lay down however, since the snow continued to fall and there was no shelter!

Boris immediately followed his running with some truly extreme pushups! He dropped to the ground hard, crushing the snow under the grip of his huge hands! He then pumped his body up and down, grunting and counting as he went.

“Comrade Humphrey, would you not try some of the work? It is good!”

“Man you is crazy! I’s hungry and it cold and I’s need shelter!” Humphrey then sighed and began walking off to find something…ANYTHING other than Boris on the snowy plain!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Peepers Pitt--Peculiar Pedestrian

Peepers’ Pitt--New Crew Askew pt. 5 of 20: “Peculiar Pedestrian”

Charlie Decaye felt sad. What if he never got home? Despite appearances, the Pumpkin-Headed Horror was anything but. He was a kind man who had duties to his job and his family. He was a kind man…but with a mean face. His horrifying looks are what had influenced Mr. Peepers to bring Decaye to his Peepers' Pitt in the first place. The plan had been to use Decaye to stir up fear in the others already there, but Mr. Peepers had misjudged Decaye‘s nature, as so many in the Peepers' Pitt were doing. It was something Decaye was unaccustomed to, since having a “pumpkin” head in his universe was evidently normal.

Decaye stood on the sand of the faux desert, and turned to look back at the EMT Man. The mental patient was bouncing up and down again, switching from crouching to standing. Each time he stood, he stretched out his arms, then pulled them back and yelled out with an “awooo.” Decaye couldn’t figure him out, and didn’t intend to. He started walking off, hoping to distance himself from the insane man. Decaye soon noticed that the EMT Man was following him! Every five steps that Decaye took, the EMT man took two! Decaye was amazed that the EMT Man was now suddenly taking notice of his actions, unlike before, when all attempts at conversation or a single glance had failed. Clearly, there was more to this EMT Man than anyone could suspect! So Decaye walked onward, with the EMT Man as a peculiar pedestrian, behind.

Mr. Peepers, invisible to Decaye and the EMT Man, floated nearby, and flashed a smile!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Ghost Hunters

New Ink Pitt--The Haunting of Doom pt. 5 of 5 : “Ghost Hunters”

Trodemus sat at the small table in his bedroom, staring at the lamplight as he thought about what to do next. The writing on the mirror was clearly the work of the supernatural. Trodemus was now certain that he wasn’t imagining things, since Belinda had seen it as well. The question was, what should he do about it? Would a séance be enough, or would the Prophet of Doom have to resort to more extreme measures to get to the bottom of his “haunting?”

As Trodemus pondered, Belinda lay naked on the bed. Her man had lost interest in her since he was obsessed over figuring things out. Belinda smirked and posed sexily on the bed, but Trodemus would not be deterred. She sighed, and switched on the flat screen TV, just in time to catch yet another marathon of the “science fiction” show, “Ghost Hunters.” Belinda pulled a bag of potato chips from under the bed and began to munch down on them. She watched as two guys stumbled around in the dark and pretended to see, hear, and record ghosts! Belinda turned up the volume really loud. She then stretched out on the bed, with her back turned to Trodemus. Doom looked up from all the noise of “Ghost Hunters,” which was mostly the two guys questioning the “ghosts.” Trodemus was about to tell Belinda to turn the TV down, but all he could see was her nice big butt! It was enough distraction to cause him to look up momentarily past Belinda to the TV screen. It was then that he realized what “Ghost Hunters” was about and quickly got an idea!

“Belinda! I know what we will do! This will put an end to the ghost and prevent my business from failing! We will start a reality show just like the “Ghost Hunters!” It will be called…TRODEMUS: SEEKER OF SPECTRES!"

All characters, stories, photos and performances
are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Bathroom Mirror

New Ink Pitt--The Haunting of Doom pt. 4 of 5 : “Bathroom Mirror”

Belinda bounced up and down in the darkened room. The curves of her vuluptous body were outlined by the shafts of moonlight entering the window. Trodemus couldn’t be happier as he lay beneath her. She truly was the perfect woman for him, as her movements somehow satisfied him not only sexually, but also prophetically!

Trodemus could see the future as he he held his big beautiful woman and moved to meet her gyrations. He could see the future and he knew that they would both come. As sure as he rose and Belinda set, it was pleasure they would both get, and that when it was done that would be all--at least for the night. Trodemus and Belinda did not reach their destination however, as suddenly, Belinda stopped her movements.

“What’s that?”

Trodemus frowned. He was so close to the destination, and it was a terrible thing for Belinda to stop their progress at this moment!

“What’s what?” Doom looked up at his lady love. Her estactic faced had shifted to one of concern.

“Don’t you hear that? It sounds like water running.” Belinda lifted herself off of Trodemus, and the Prophet of Doom lost all hope of reaching the destination--for the moment. Belinda walked naked over to the closed bathroom door, while pointing to the light in the crack between the floor and the door itself.

“Did you leave the water running?” Trodemus let Belinda know that he had not, and that the only place there should have been running water was elsewhere! Trodemus got up and walked over to stand by Belinda, who seemed afraid to open the door. Doom put his hand around the door handle and turned the knob…

He swung the door open to reveal hot water running into the tub, and lots of steam filling the air. Next to the tub was a mirror that was fogged over, with the exception of some shapes that appeared there. The shapes were words, and they read:

“YOUR BUSINESS WILL END.”

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Betram Bunny's Announcement

Shit Pitt--Betram Bunny's Announcement

All characters, stories, and performances are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Curvaceous Compression

New Ink Pitt--The Haunting of Doom pt. 3 of 5 : “Curvaceous Compression”

“OH YES BELINDA! THAT FEELS SO GOOD!”

Trodemus, Prophet of Doom lay face down in his bed. His big beautiful woman, Belinda, sat on top of him, massaging his back. Trodemus had removed his cloak, with the exception of the cowl. Trodemus smiled from all the pleasure he was receiving!

“Mmm, Belinda! Give me more pressure!”

Belinda was completely naked! She straddled the Prophet of Doom with wonderful curves that were the envy of all other forms in the room! Her huge, rounded breasts cascaded from her body like drops of water down a mountainside. As she leaned over, they hung in “u” shapes before splashing into the back of Trodemus and expanding outward in sexiness from the force. Belinda now lay completely on top of Trodemus’ body, pressing him into the mattress with her weight!

“Yes Belinda! That’s it! Yesss!!”

Trodemus and Belinda lay there silently for a bit, savoring the moment. Doom was really into the “curvaceous compression” that his lady love was supplying and felt wonderful! This freaky action was something the couple did often, and in varying positions, but always with Belinda on top! It allowed Trodemus to think, and come up with solutions to his problems. His biggest problem was the ghost that had been haunting him. He’d seen it in their room minutes ago, but it quickly disappeared! Belinda pointed out a white towel on a nearby chair and suggested that perhaps Doom had been seeing things. Trodemus felt that such a thing was possible, but he knew what he saw! The ghost was there, and he was intent on finding it and making it explain itself!

“I know what I will do! Blacktoes and I will have another séance! We will force the ghost out of hiding!”

Belinda kissed Doom on the neck and then the cheek. “Ooo baby, I knew you’d come up with a plan! You are such a wonderful man, and I’m sure you’ll take care of that mean old ghost for good! Right now though, I want you to…”

What Belinda said at that point was a private matter, but their actions in the next moment gave away the gist of it. Trodemus turned around in the bed and Belinda climbed into position. As the two made passionate love on the bed, they did not notice a small shaft of light appear in the gap of the closed bathroom door and floor, or the sound of running water in the tub!

All characters, stories, and performances
are (C) 2012 Joshua Dyson
Photo by Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Levitating Lewdness

New Ink Pitt--The Haunting of Doom pt. 2 of 5: "Levitating Lewdness"

The Prophet of Doom rose up in bed to face the outline of the ghost before him, using his telekinetic power to lift himself up in the air! Trodemus was now levitating about six inches above his mattress, and was on level with the ghost. Below him, Belinda lay sleeping soundly.

“GHOST!” Trodemus yelled loudly, forgetting his lady love was still asleep. “Do you know who it is that you torment?” Trodemus stared at the floating white outline that was in the shape of a traditional white sheet ghost. When the ghost did not reply, Doom became angry, and decided to let it know exactly who it was dealing with.

“I have seen the future and know what is to come! As sure as the sun rises and sets, the Prophet knows and NEVER forgets! I am…TRODEMUS, PROPHET OF DOOM!” Still no reply came from the ghost.

“You would do well to leave this place, for I, Trodemus, am a being of immense power, in tune with the supernatural! I shall banish you by force with my otherwordly powers if necessary, and cause you much pain! Take heed, Spirit! It is no mere mortal you face in Trodemus, Prophet of Doom!”

Below Doom, Belinda stirred. She wiped her eyes and let out a huge yawn before looking up.

“Troddie, what ya doing up there?”
“Silence, Belinda! The Prophet of Doom is in conversation with a ghost! You will heed my demands, Spirit!”
“Whatever you say, Troddie. Hehe”
“What are you giggling at, woman!?”
“Troddie, you should probably look down. I see your supernatural…parts!”

Trodemus turned to look down to realize that his parts were indeed showing since Belinda was looking straight up his cloak! He fumbled with his hands to cover himself.

“No Troddie, don’t! I’m enjoying the view! Love it when you give the supernatural orders! Makes you a really big man mmmmm!!”

Trodemus smiled. “Not now, Belinda! Can’t you see I’m in conflict with this gh--” As Trodemus turned to face the ghost once more, he realized it was gone! He floated back down and lay beside Belinda, puzzled.

“Where’d it go?”
“Where’d what go?” Belinda asked.
“The ghost! It was just right there--glowing bright as day! Didn’t you see it?”
Belinda smirked. “I didn’t see anything, honey. I’ll take your word for it though. I know you’re in touch with the supernatural, however…” She then pointed at a white towel laid across a chair near the bed. “…maybe you just need to relax.”

All characters, stories, and performances
are (C) 2012 Joshua Dyson
Photo by Joshua Dyson and Kristen Whitehead

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.