New Ink Pitt--Windshield Wondering

New Ink Pitt--Rufus' Endowment Results pt. 1 of 6:  Windshield Wondering

"MOMEEE! WHAT YOU DOIN' IN THERE?!?"  Rufus, Rachel's special son, yelled loudly through glass as his face pressed against the minivan's windshield.

Rachel struggled to find her clothing, as she had just had sex with Lenny the Leprechaun--again--and had fallen asleep with him naked in the front seat of her minivan!

"MOMEEE!  WHAT DAT HANGING OFF YOUR CHEST?!?  IT LOOK LIKE...LIKE...LIKE...YOUR BOOBIES!!! WHAHHH!"  Rufus' face twisted as he slid his open mouth along the windshield surface and bawled like a baby.

"I SEE MY MOMEEE'S BOOBIES AND THAT BAD BAD BAD!  IT NOT MY FAULT THOUGH!"  Rufus then turned his attention to the equally naked Lenny the Leprechaun, eyeing him hatefully as he attempted to press his eyes into the windshield.

"OW! MY NOSE!"  Rufus pulled away from the windshield when he bumped his nose.  Lenny giggled and then looked over at Rachel as she scrambled to get her clothing out of the floorboard.

"Ah Lass!  How are ye doin' over there?"  Lenny smirked and stood up on the seat, allowing Rachel to see the full length of his 4'3" frame and the full length of his big green dragon as she rose her head up from looking in the floorboard.  Her eyes met the green dragon and she couldn't help but smirk back at him, if only for a moment.  She then remembered Rufus.

"Oh Lenny!  Oh my God, Lenny!  Put this on!  Rufus is already freaked out enough from seeing me naked!"

Rachel threw the item of clothing at Lenny, only to realize it was her panties!

"Ah Rachel, I'd be happy ta put these on, but furst I might play with them a wee bit!  Lenny slipped the panties over his big green dragon, but not in the way they were supposed to.  He was about to work them around himself and get some satisfaction, when Rachel pulled them off of him quickly and threw Lenny's green pants over to him.

"Enough Lenny!  Put your pants on!"

Lenny got partially dressed just in time as Rufus was now over his nose pain and pressed his mouth back against the windshield again.

"IT LENNY!  HE MAKE MOMEEE BE BAD BAD BAD!  WHAT HE MAKE YOU DO IN THERE, MOMEE?"

"Rufus!! Honey, get off the car window!!  Mommy was just--playing a game with Lenny!"

Rufus pressed his face sideways into the windshield, with his cheek squished up against it, making a horrible face.

"WHAA?  A GAME?!?  MOMEE I WAN' PLAY TOO!!"

Lenny giggled as he slipped on his shirt.  "Damn retard wants ta play too!"

Rachel looked angrily at him.  "Don't call him that!  He's special!  Not a retard!"  She found her bra and fumbled with it as Rufus continued to stare at them sideways.  She finally got it clasped and slipped her panties on as well.

"No Rufus, you can't!  This is--a private game between Mommy and Lenny!  It's over now anyway!"

"OVER?  WHAA?  I SAD NOW, MOMEE!"

"I'm sorry honey.  You can play next time."  Lenny rolled his eyes at that statement.
"Rufus, how are you here?  You're supposed to be at your endowment, miles down the road!"

"I could ask you the same thing, "Sister" Rachel!"  Rachel's heart sank as Brother Brad walked up to the car!
Rufus, feeling his mommy's regret, then slid down the windshield mouth first, leaving a trail of saliva behind!


All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real

persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

-The Peeper #13 Comedy Newsletter--BREASTAURANT SPECIAL now available!  
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First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!
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Sketch Cards of the Week--50 Shades Darker

Shit Pitt--Monica on the Yacht

Shit Pitt--Sway of the Sweater pt. 4 of 8:  Monica on the Yacht 

Monica walked onto the beach as the first signs of daylight began to brighten the sky.  She looked out towards the ocean and saw Terrance the Pirate's yacht.  She was a bit puzzled, as this stretch of Tutuila was deserted and supposed to be closed for the filming of Child Castaways.  There were no ports or fishing villages for a good mile, so seeing a yacht there was a bit odd.  Intrigued, she decided to take a closer look and hoped that maybe she'd find the missing Clementine.

The yacht was anchored closely to the shore, close enough that she could walk to it through some water.  Monica wished she had brought her swimsuit however, as her robe got wet and slowed her progress towards the boat.  She could have disrobed, but she didn't want whoever was on the yacht to see her naked, no matter how much of a native she was!  Monica smiled as she thought about how Clementine had already seen most or if not all of her during their lovemaking session!  She enjoyed his company a lot, and thought he felt the same way.  It would have been unlike him to run off after all that!

"YARR!  WHO GOES THERE?!?"  The voice of Peyton "the pirate" rang out across the water as he appeared on the deck of the yacht.

"Peyton?!?  What are you doing up there?"  Monica dreaded the answer as she sloshed through the water closer to the boat.  No doubt Peyton was up to some mischief yet again.

"Ms Monica!  I-I was just playin' pirate!  See?"  He pointed to his eye patch and bandanna.

"Peyton, get off of there--right now!"

"Aww  but Ms Monica--"

"No excuses!"

Peyton made a sad face, and when that didn't work, he smirked again.  He then laughed and turned to run.

"Ya gotta catch me first!"

Monica cursed under her breath as she scrambled to get after the problem child.  Her robe was soaked on the edges, making it heavier.  She struggled to climb up and board the yacht.  Finally, she reached the deck and hoisted herself over.

"Whew!  The prop boats in Child Castaways aren't this difficult!"  Monica shook off the slight fatigue from the climb and  stood to her feet.  As she did, she saw a strange sight.  "What the hell?!?"  Monica gasped as she looked across the deck to see Terrance the Pirate tied up and gagged..  He bounced around and kept trying to talk.  Monica cautiously walked towards him and removed the tape from his mouth.

"Wench!  Whoever ya be, leave my vessel and take the rug rat with ya!  Hearken to the words of Terrance the Terrible!  Yarr!"

Monica stared for several seconds before a huge smile came to her lips.  She then started laughing!

"Yarr how dare ya mock Terrance the Pirate?!?  If''n I was not trussed up right now, I'd pull out my sword and force ya ta walk the plank!  Yarrr!!"

"Are you for real?"  Monica was finally able to stop laughing.

"Yarr!  Land lubber!  I'll show ya how real I be, soon as I get loose!"

"Yarr?  Who says that?  Isn't that a bit dated?  Don't think I ever heard Captain Jack Sparrow say yarr.  This has gotta be a joke!  Did Jeffrey hire you as a surprise for the movie?"

Terrance squirmed in his ropes.  "Surprise?  Jeffery? Movie?  Terrance the Terrible knows nothing of these!  He does know that he likes to pillage and plunder and  a capture the booty!"

He looked Monica's body up and down as he said "booty" and smirked.

Before she could respond to his checking her out, she heard gunshots ring out from down the beach.  Monica dropped down and yelled for Peyton to stay wherever he was."

"Yarr that be my captors!  Probably got Clementine!"

Monica crawled over to Terrance and grabbed him by the vest.  "What?!?  Who's got Clementine?!?"

The Pirate's eyes grew big.  "Calls himself Shithead!"

Monica smirked.  "Shit--head?  What kind of name is Shithead?  That's more of an insult than a name."

Terrance shook his head.  "Don't matter.  Shithead be a very powerful enemy who's seekin' revenge.  Used his man, Halabaad, to attack my yacht and take me captive!"

Monica surveyed the beach and water around them again before turning back to Terrance.  "But why?"

Shithead wants revenge on me and the others who rebelled 'gainst him.  Came here ta recapture his other man--Percy Clementine!"

Monica's eyes grew big in astonishment.  "Percy?  Working with a kidnapper?!?  You talking about Percy Clementine, childrens show host?"

"Yarr that be the man!"  Terrance blurted out as he moved around and worked to untie his hands that were bound behind him.  "Me and Percy worked together on Percy's Playtime.    He needed a pirate and I got hired since I be a real pirate!"

Whatever, Buddy!" Monica frowned.  "Listen I need you to..."  Before Monica could finish her sentence, they heard more gunshots coming from down the beach.

"Percy!!!" Monica shouted.


All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2017 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real

persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

-The Peeper #13 Comedy Newsletter--BREASTAURANT SPECIAL now available!  
Print Version---$1.99
PDF Format--0.99

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip
First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!
$5.00  For Mature Readers.

MY FINE ART STUDIO

Sketch Cards of the Week--50 Shades Darker