New Ink Pitt--Lenny’s Lifestyle pt. 1 of 5: “At the Irish Pub”
Rachel sat uncomfortably on a bar stool. She appeared to be out of place in the Irish Pub Lenny the Leprechuan had invited her to. When Rachel requested that Lenny go out with her on a series of dates not ending in sex, this was not one of the places she had invisioned them going. However, after the three dates she planned ended in disaster, Rachel was at a loss for ideas. So she agreed to go with Lenny, and see what his idea of a good time was like. She never expected to be sitting in the noisy pub next to a drunken leprechaun!
Rachel sat uncomfortably on a bar stool. She appeared to be out of place in the Irish Pub Lenny the Leprechuan had invited her to. When Rachel requested that Lenny go out with her on a series of dates not ending in sex, this was not one of the places she had invisioned them going. However, after the three dates she planned ended in disaster, Rachel was at a loss for ideas. So she agreed to go with Lenny, and see what his idea of a good time was like. She never expected to be sitting in the noisy pub next to a drunken leprechaun!
“’ey Rachel are ye havin’ a good time, Lass?”
Lenny leaned on the edge of the bar, looking at Rachel with glazed eyes. He was so close to her that she could smell his awful alcohol breath. Rachel winced and tried to ignore it. She didn’t want to hurt Lenny’s feelings by telling him how bad it was. Lenny had been drinking non-stop since they had arrived. After they were kicked out of Family Home Meeting, the leprechuan had begged Rachel to go with him to an Irish Pub, so he could show her a REAL good time! So far, the only person having fun was Lenny!
“Lenny, you’re drunk! We need to go!”
“What are ye talkin’ about, Rachel? We havenae had enough fuun yet, lass!”
“We’ve had plenty of excitement for one night…let’s go home!”
“What are ye talkin’ about, Rachel? We havenae had enough fuun yet, lass!”
“We’ve had plenty of excitement for one night…let’s go home!”
Lenny turned and grabbed a dish filled with peanuts. He eyed them suspciously for a moment before looking back up and grinning at Rachel.
“Let me ask me pot’o gold!”
Rachel looked shocked. Was Lenny really so drunk that he thought the peanuts were gold coins? Evidently he did, as he went on talking to them!
“What say ye, pot’o gold? Should me and the fine lass, Rachel go home?”
Lenny then held the dish of peanuts to his ear and shook them. In his drunkeness, most of them fell to the floor. Lenny looked at what was left.
“Me pot’o gold says, NO! We cannae leave until ye have had a good time along with meself…which means ye have to drink something!”
Lenny held out a glass of green beer and told Rachel to drink it since it would help her relax and have a good time. Rachel refused. After about ten minutes of them aruging, Lenny decided he would take another approach. Despite being drunk, he declared that he would tell an Irish tale that would “tickle Rachel out of her timidness!”
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All characters, photos, stories, and performances are
(C) 2011 Joshua Dyson
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