Rachel is pregnant!
While waiting to find out whether or not he was sterile from his doctor, Lenny the Leprechaun had been joined in the waiting room by Rachel, the Mormon Mommy, herself! Rachels retarded son, Rufus, had punched himself in the nuts when Rachel wouldn’t let him go trick or treating! The act was a direct imitation of something Lenny had done to himself back when he first got the idea that he could be sterile. Rachel blamed Lenny for Rufus’ actions and was prepared for a big argument, until the news came--Lenny was not sterile!
“So, Rachel, ye better be keeping that stroller ye were pushing the lad around in, because ye are about to have a real baby--our baby! Go ahead and tell the truth, Lassie! Ye be pregnant with me seed!”
Rachel began to cry but looked angry at the same time. “NO! I said I wouldn’t admit that to you…EVER…because it’s just not true! I’m not pregnant!”
Lenny smiled. “Ah, don’t cry, Lassie! Ol’ Lenny isn’t gonna leave ya to raise the wee one alone! I love ye, Rachel, and I want to spend the rest of me life with you! Now, we can be a family!”
The tears began streaming down Rachel’s face. “NO! We are NOT a family! I don’t care if you DID impregnate me! We can never be a family! I want you to leave me and my son alone, you hear? I don’t care if you punch yourself again--this time, I won’t be feeling sorry for you!” With that, Rachel turned and strormed outside the waiting room! Lenny followed.
The Pitt Report updates Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday nights!
All characters, stories, and performances are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson
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