Lenny can't believe Russell Brand is
even in a movie!
New Ink Pitt--Dating Difficulty pt. 3 of 5: “Movie Date”
Rachel and Lenny sat close to each other in a movie theater, watching the premiere of the re-imagined romantic comedy, Arthur, staring the creepy Russell Brand. Lenny thought he was creepy at least, and tried to get Rachel to agree to watch Your Highness, starring a half-naked Natalie Portman! Rachel would have none of that however, because she didn’t want her potential future husband checking out any women other than herself. Rachel should have realized that Lenny’s thoughts on these dates were bound to wander since he knew there would be no sexual payoff at the end.
Halfway through the movie, Lenny was getting restless. As Russell Brand paraded around on the big screen acting like a damn fool and complaining about chosing between love or the money he could get in an arranged marriage, Lenny began to think about Rachel. He looked around at the darkness of the theater, and began to think dirty thoughts. He knew what he’d rather be doing with Rachel in the dark right now! He slid his stubby little hand over and touched Rachel’s fingers. She took his hand and smiled down at him before once more turning her attention to the movie. Russell Brand smiled a big, stupid, bearded smile that disgusted Lenny. They will let anyone be an actor these days!
Lenny returned to his dirty thoughts about Rachel. He was trying so hard to be good, and show Rachel that he could go out with her and enjoy her company without it all ending in sex. His desire was too great however, as he leaned his little body forward and put his hand on her leg. Rachel looked down with an unpleasant look on her face, but then she just ignored Lenny, and continued watching the movie, in the hopes that his hand would go no farther. Her hopes would be dashed however, as before Russell Brand could fully finish making a jackass out of himself and totally killing the movie, Lenny had run his hand up Rachel’s dress, caressing her most private place! A moment later, and the lecherous leprechaun leapt up onto her, and grabbed one of her breasts in his other hand and began fondling it! Rachel yelled for Lenny to stop, which probably made the awful movie they had been watching a whole lot more interesting for everyone in the theater! Rachel pushed Lenny off and told him no. She then walked out of the theater. Lenny stood in the middle of the aisle between the seats for a moment. He then looked back at the screen and yelled, “Aye, shut da hell up, Russell!” He then ran off after Rachel.
Rachel and Lenny sat close to each other in a movie theater, watching the premiere of the re-imagined romantic comedy, Arthur, staring the creepy Russell Brand. Lenny thought he was creepy at least, and tried to get Rachel to agree to watch Your Highness, starring a half-naked Natalie Portman! Rachel would have none of that however, because she didn’t want her potential future husband checking out any women other than herself. Rachel should have realized that Lenny’s thoughts on these dates were bound to wander since he knew there would be no sexual payoff at the end.
Halfway through the movie, Lenny was getting restless. As Russell Brand paraded around on the big screen acting like a damn fool and complaining about chosing between love or the money he could get in an arranged marriage, Lenny began to think about Rachel. He looked around at the darkness of the theater, and began to think dirty thoughts. He knew what he’d rather be doing with Rachel in the dark right now! He slid his stubby little hand over and touched Rachel’s fingers. She took his hand and smiled down at him before once more turning her attention to the movie. Russell Brand smiled a big, stupid, bearded smile that disgusted Lenny. They will let anyone be an actor these days!
Lenny returned to his dirty thoughts about Rachel. He was trying so hard to be good, and show Rachel that he could go out with her and enjoy her company without it all ending in sex. His desire was too great however, as he leaned his little body forward and put his hand on her leg. Rachel looked down with an unpleasant look on her face, but then she just ignored Lenny, and continued watching the movie, in the hopes that his hand would go no farther. Her hopes would be dashed however, as before Russell Brand could fully finish making a jackass out of himself and totally killing the movie, Lenny had run his hand up Rachel’s dress, caressing her most private place! A moment later, and the lecherous leprechaun leapt up onto her, and grabbed one of her breasts in his other hand and began fondling it! Rachel yelled for Lenny to stop, which probably made the awful movie they had been watching a whole lot more interesting for everyone in the theater! Rachel pushed Lenny off and told him no. She then walked out of the theater. Lenny stood in the middle of the aisle between the seats for a moment. He then looked back at the screen and yelled, “Aye, shut da hell up, Russell!” He then ran off after Rachel.
The Pitt Report updates Mondays.
All characters, photos, stories, and performances are
(C) 2011 Joshua Dyson
All characters, photos, stories, and performances are
(C) 2011 Joshua Dyson
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