Wednesday, June 24, 2015

New Ink Pitt--Targeting Manly Man Midnight

New Ink Pitt--Dealing with the Dupes pt. 6 of 12:  Targeting Manly Man Midnight
Manly Man meets MM Midnight!

Manly Man walked alone on a darkened street around midnight. Up until this point, his dupes had been incredibly easy to find, with the exception of Gaymerica, who had gone into hiding.  Manly Man Safari had been in the woods with Billy G, Manly Man Yellow was on stage doing stand-up comedy, and Manly Man Brown was very public with his environmentalist tour.  Of the five duplicates, there was only one that the original Manly Man had yet to deal with personally--Manly Man Midnight.
     Manly Man Midnight had disappeared immediately after Gaymerica and Billy G had gotten the dupes out of jail.  The original Manly Man had kept tabs on him up until that point, but now, it was as if Midnight had dropped right off the face of the earth!  Earlier, while in disguise, Manly Man had questioned an old bag lady he met on the street who said she had spotted Manly Man Midnight recently, prowling around at…well midnight... in the area.  Manly Man knew very little about Manly Man Midnight, even though he was supposed to be an aspect of his own personality.  All he knew was that Midnight liked to “come out at night.”  Manly Man giggled.  “Ooo he really is a closet homo if he can only come out at night!”  Manly Man walked into the alley where the bag lady said she saw Midnight the night before.  “Ok, end of the line, Sugar!  It’s dark, Midnight, so come on out of your closet and let me see your gayness!”  Manly Man had been searching for Midnight for a while, and had given up the idea of surprising him like he had the other dupes.  Besides, it was dark out, and no one that mattered would see him anyway.  He didn’t even have his pistol drawn in an attempt to shoot Midnight.  “I’m waiting, Dear!”
      Suddenly, the Manly Man was grabbed from behind!  Two strong hands grabbed him and pulled him backwards!  Manly Man didn’t have time to react before he felt a sharp stinging pain in his neck!  Manly Man looked at the hands holding him and he knew it was Midnight!  The Man Princess then used his own strength, acquired from his years as a personal trainer, to make his assailant let go!  “Ooo Sugar, you like it rough, huh?”  Manly Man felt his neck.  Midnight had not drawn blood…yet.  Manly Man then looked at his attacker.  It was indeed Manly Man Midnight, with his darkened makeup complete with black eyeliner!  He spoke. “Who are you?!?”  Manly Man whirled around, shoving his ass out and smacking it.  “Well, I’m the Original Man Princess, Sugar…here to put an end to you and your naughty brothers!”  Midnight was expressionless.  “I’m the Manly Man Midnight, and I VANT TO SUCK YOUR VLOOD!”  He then lunged at Manly Man, mouth open to reveal fangs!  Manly Man giggled.  “Oh my goodness!  Is Halloween here already?  I’m so sorry, honey, because I don’t have any candy!”  Manly Man dodged Midnight, and then kicked him onto the ground hard.  “Gragghh I am Manly Man Midnight!  I only come out at night because I’m a GAY VAMPIRE!!!”  Manly Man looked at Midnight for a moment before he burst out in a fit of laughter.   “Oh my!  You are so kidding, right?  You think you’re a vampire, and a gay vampire at that? Sugar, are you sure you came from my semen?  Ooo that is so silly…but it’s also sexy…having another man bite you in the neck”  Realizing Manly Man had made of fool of him, Midnight leapt to his feet and charged Manly Man again.  This time, the Man Princess was ready though, and shot Midnight right in the leg with Bates’ pistol.  He then squatted down beside the fallen Midnight, who was holding his leg in pain.  “Ok, Midnight, the Gay Vampire,  I want you to send my dupes a message.  Tell them that the real Manly Man is back, and now that I’ve marked you all, your faggy fakery is over!  It’s time for you all to line up behind the original, or say goodbye!  With that, Manly Man ran off into the night, leaving Midnight on the ground wounded.

*To see the events leading up to this story, check the Classic Pitt Report blog at http://classicpittreport.blogspot.com

NEXT: BILLY G'S CALL
WEDNESDAY JULY 1, 2015

All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2015 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work

are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

NOW CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE MR. PEEPERS CHARACTER!!

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
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First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!

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Wednesday, June 17, 2015

New Ink Pitt--Targeting Manly Man Brown

New Ink Pitt--Dealing with the Dupes pt. 5 of 12:  Targeting Manly Man Brown
What is MM Brown Doing?

Last time, the original Manly Man attacked Manly Man Yellow, shooting him in the leg during an awful stand-up comedy performance! The original Man Princess then set out to find and target another one of his duplicates--Manly Man Brown!  Like Manly Man Yellow,  Brown wasn’t hard to find.  He certainly wasn’t working for UPS or asking “what can brown do for you?”  No, he was out making a real difference…at least that’s what he thought.  Manly Man Brown, being the hardcore tree hugger that he was, was out trying to save the environment and encouraging everyone to “go green.”  He had been making speeches everywhere while on his Naturephilia tour, promoting respect and care for the environment.  While Manly Man Brown appeared very stable with a worthy cause, that did not mean he was without vice.  He was, after all, the Manly Man’s dupe!  It was a given that Brown would have some sort of lustful desires that appeared odd to others, and he had them all right--desires so odd that even the original Manly Man would be shocked!
     Manly Man found Brown in a most unlikely place. Unlikely because during the tour, Brown had been visiting major cities.  Manly Man had never expected to find his Dirt-loving Dupe here--in the middle of the woods!  Manly Man walked through some bushes, as he had been since finding Brown’s tour bus stopped on a roadside and empty.  It appeared that Brown had driven the bus out there himself, and was all alone.  Manly Man liked that, because he could shoot at Brown and not have to worry about any witnesses, unlike last time when he shot Manly Man Yellow in a public place!  After walking a bit more, Manly Man saw Brown!  Manly Man’s eyes grew big.  Brown was naked, and had his ass turned towards Manly Man!  Manly Man looked back at his own ass.  “Ooo he gets it from me! Hehe!”  Brown then went over to a tree, and literally hugged it!  As Manly Man continued watching, he realized that Brown was a lot more friendly with nature than he thought!  Manly Man looked on in disbelief as Manly Man Brown began humping the tree!  “Oh my goodness!” Manly Man said, “I’m not sure if I should touch myself or the dirt!”  Manly Man continued watching, and waited until Brown had his release…all over the tree bark!  Manly Man made his decision.  “Now sugar, that is such a waste!  You could have used that on your boyfriend, instead of some lifeless tree!” Manly Man was a bit mad, and quickly aimed Bates’ pistol at Manly Man Brown!  He took one shot and hit the tree!  Manly Man then ran off, satisfied by making his mark on the bark!  “That’ll show you, freak!  The Manly Man is supposed to like guys, not trees!”
After this, Manly Man had a change of heart about his duplicates.  He no longer had any intent to kill them.  “Ooo once I’ve left my mark on all my naughty duplicates, then I will reveal myself to them, and reveal the plans I’ve had since arriving here in the New Ink Pitt!”  He then ran off, in search of his next target!

*To see the events leading up to this story, check the Classic Pitt Report blog at http://classicpittreport.blogspot.com

NEXT:  TARGETING MANLY MAN MIDNIGHT
WEDNESDAY JUNE 24, 2015

All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2015 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work

are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

NOW CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE MR. PEEPERS CHARACTER!!

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip
First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!

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Check out my Sketch Card of the Week...THE GREEN RANGER OF THE POWER RANGERS!

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

New Ink Pitt--Targeting Manly Man Yellow

New Ink Pitt--Dealing with the Dupes pt. 4 of 12:  Targeting Manly Man Yellow
Manly Man Yellow on stage!

After the attempted assassination of the Manly Man Gaymerica, the five Manly Men went their separate ways in the hope of throwing off their would-be assassin by forcing him to hunt each one individually.  Manly Man Safari had Billy G to protect him, but he still got shot in the ass.  Now, the Manly Man Yellow, proud former ambASSador of the Manly Man Gaymerica, was wayy too flamboyant to hide from anything.  In fact, since the Manlies split, Yellow had been the only one to actually stay out in the open, basking in the sunlight that mirrored the color of his outfit!  Yellow had used the absence of Gaymerica to make himself into a star!  He had already become a motivational speaker, and now wanted to become a stand-up comic.  He referenced his smiling yellow face as the reason he wanted to get into the business.  With a face like that, he was practically a living smiley face!  Everything about him screamed humor--or at least that’s what he told everyone.  When the would-be assassin, the real Manly Man showed up, Yellow was actually in the middle of his first stand-up routine in a club.  The Manly Man sat in the back, marveling that one his dupes had become a performer!  He then felt a bit threatened.  “There is no way you can be better than the original Man Princess, Sugar!“  However, before he shot at him, Manly Man wanted to at least see if Yellow was any good or not.  So he listened.  The Manly Man Yellow delivered a set up, “So I’m gay…” followed by a punch line.  “…that means my significant other has the same parts I do!”  The audience was silent.  Yellow continued.  “So what do you do when your mate has the same parts?  Simple…you comapre them!” Silence.  “Which leads to a lot of arguments, let me tell ya!  My boyfriend says his is bigger, and then I say mine is bigger, and we go back and forth like that.”  The Manly Man cringed.  Manly Man Yellow was awful!  His jokes absolutely sucked, and it needed to end fast!  Manly Man drew Officer Bates’ pistol.  “Sorry, Yellow, this show is over!”  Manly Man fired off a shot, which hit Yellow right in the leg and knocked him off his feet!  He couldn’t do stand-up if he couldn’t stand..hopefully.  Manly Man giggled and then ran out of the club.  He almost got caught by security, but he managed to dodge them and escape through a rear exit.  Manly Man was spotted, but would anyone be able to distinguish him from the other Manlies?  Once outside, Manly Man found safety in an alley.  Once again, he had failed in killing one of his duplicates.  It seemed that now he was just out to prove to them that he was the original Manly Man and they were all fakers!  He no longer had any intent to kill them.  “Ooo once I’ve left my mark on all my naughty duplicates, then I will reveal myself to them, and reveal the plans I’ve had since arriving here in the New Ink Pitt!”  He then ran off, in search of his next target!

*To see the events leading up to this story, check the Classic Pitt Report blog at http://classicpittreport.blogspot.com

NEXT:  TARGETING MANLY MAN BROWN
WEDNESDAY JUNE 17, 2015

All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2015 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work

are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

NOW CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE MR. PEEPERS CHARACTER!!

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip
First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!

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Wednesday, June 3, 2015

New Ink Pitt--Billy G's Benefit Yard Sale

New Ink Pitt--Dealing with the Dupes INTERLUDE: “Billy G's Benefit Yard Sale ”
Billy G with Sock Monkey & 80's Sweater!
TAKEN FROM BILLY G'S ITEM DESCRIPTION ON A POPULAR ONLINE AUCTION WEBSITE:
"Hey, how ya’ll doin?  This here’s the one and only Billy G. Hydrick and ah need yore help!  See, mah friend, the Manly Man Safari…well he got hurt!  Someone shot him in the ass when we wuz getting  ready to go skinny dippin!  Ah had already got mah clothes off, and wuz nekkid as the day ah came inta the world, and then BOOM somebody went and shot Safari in the ass!  Well, anyway, whoever it is, just wait till Billy G. gets ahold of you!  Ah might raise some hell like mah older brother, Trevor!  Well, seeing as how the Manly Men have been targeted by an  assassin, it ain't no surprise that Safari got shot.  Trouble is, we got no money since Manly Man Gaymerica went into hidin’ and the other Manlies split as well!  So ah tried selling some of mah items in a yard sale.  It didn’t go too well, so ah figgered ah’d come on here…the wild and wooly web, and put some of mah stuff up for auction on this site!  I am selling mah sock monkey, Dave!  Ah used ta sleep with him when ah was scared'a the dark!  Ah also got mah colorful 1980's sweater for sale!  It ain't been washed in about 2 decades, so it's still gotta vintage 1980's smell!"

*To see the events leading up to this story, check the Classic Pitt Report blog at http://classicpittreport.blogspot.com

NEXT:  TARGETING MANLY MAN YELLOW
WEDNESDAY JUNE 10, 2015

All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2015 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work

are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

NOW CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE MR. PEEPERS CHARACTER!!

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip
First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!

SKETCH CARD COMMISSIONS
Now taking Sketch Card Commissions at Awerty Studio
Check out my Sketch Card of the Week...REESE WITHERSPOON AS COOPER FROM THE MOVIE HOT PURSUIT!