Wednesday, September 23, 2015

New Ink Pitt--Before the Boom

New Ink Pitt--Dealing with the Dupes pt. 11 of 12: Before the Boom
Markéta meets the Manly Man!


The Original Manly Man pushed the stretcher carrying Manly Man Gaymerica into the abandoned office building.  The stretcher wheels ground along the charred surface of the first floor, which had been set ablaze by Screenface a few days before.  They passed the trap door that Screenface and Officer Bates had both gone through before getting captured by Manly Man.  They went down a long darkened hall that led to an elevator that was powered by some sort of generator Screenface had set up.  Manly Man then wheeled his dupe in and started whistling.

“Sorry there’s no elevator music for us, Gaymerica!  Would be soooo romantic with us in here all alone!  We’d stare into each others’ eyes and have some fruity drinks before making love…right there on your stretcher! Hehe!  Course it would help if you were awake ha!”

Manly Man sighed.  “But ya can think Screenie Poo for that!  He’s so busy being a silly super villain that he doesn’t think about romantic things…or all the naughty stuff ya can do with your partner on an elevator ride oooo!”

DING!

“Ok sugar, this is our floor!  Time to get off,  but by moving our legs not our dicks!  That comes later heheh!”

The door slid open, revealing Markéta and Screenface’s men.

“I agree Manly Man Original.  It is time for you to get off…and come with us!”  Markéta waved her hand, and the two men raised assault rifles, which they pointed at the two Manly Men.

“Oh my goodness! It’s a stick up!”  Manly Man giggled.  “I don’t have any money, but I can offer you two gentlemen lip service, meaning my lips around your--”

“SHUT UP!”  Markéta shouted.  “You will come with us because you are now prisoner of Screenface!”

“Ooo and who are you, their slutty sister?  Sorry, the Manly Man might be queer and very freaky, but he doesn’t do boy on girl action!  You’ll have to find someone else!”

Markéta then pulled out her whip and snapped it in the Manly Man’s direction, nearly smacking him right in the head!

“Hey!  That means war, Sister!”  Manly Man prepared to leap towards Markéta but was stopped by a single dart to the neck!  It was a tranquilizer dart shot from a special weapon held by Screenface.

“Screenface! What you do here?”

Screenface laughed.  “My apologies, Fair Markéta.  I do not wish to rob you of enjoyment, but I had to come and capture this one myself after he invaded our hideout and took me hostage!”  He walked up to the now asleep Manly Man and scoffed.  “Now I will finally be rid of you and your perversion!  So speaks SCREENFAACE!”

*****

Meanwhile, back at the hospital where Manly Men Yellow, Safari, Brown, and Midnight have been recovering along with “First Man” Billy G. Hydrick…

“C’mon, Fellas!  Ya’ll load inta this here truck!”  Billy G. shouted from the driver’s seat of an old pickup truck he’d purchased with money paid to him by Manly Man Gaymerica during his service in the “presidential” campaign.  Safari opened the passenger’s door and then climbed on all fours into the truck, curling up next to Billy G like some weird cross between a really clingy girlfriend and a puppy!  Behind him came Manly Man Yellow, who promised that as he rode shotgun that he’d tell as many jokes as possible to keep the mood light!  Brown and Midnight got into the back and would end up discussing tree hugging and vampirism as acceptable alternative lifestyles!

“All right!  Let’s go rescue Manly Man Gaymerica from…the umm Manly Man!”  Billy G looked confused, but put the truck in gear and drove off in the direction of the office building hideout!

NEXT:  THE BOOM
RETURNS WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 28, 2015

All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2015 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work

are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental


NOW CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE MR. PEEPERS CHARACTER!!

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip
First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!
$2.99 plus shipping!  For Mature Readers.



 


Also available for purchase: the Peeper #7 for only 50 cents!
All-new issue of the comedy newsletter for August 2015
Features Mr. Peepers' trip to the Tilted Kilt & Billy G's KFC Investigation!





















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Wednesday, September 9, 2015

New Ink Pitt--Plans for Manly Man

New Ink Pitt--Secret Signals pt. 2 of 2: “Plans for Manly Man”

Officer Bates coughed as the rest of the pink smoke of the gay gas finally left the concrete room.  The woman known as Markéta had helped Screenface leave the room right after her appearance, leaving Bates behind.  Luckily the cramps had left him and he felt himself again.

The metal door to the concrete room suddenly opened, and two men in black suits stormed the room.  They grabbed the weakened Bates and shoved him up against the wall.  A few moments later he was once more bound there, held by the shackles attached to it.  The two men moved aside as Screenface strode in, with the lovely Markéta on his arm.

“Ah, Officer Bates are you feeling better?  I know I am…now that I’ve had a chance to escape the “gay” gas.  I see you’ve met my men.”

Bates gritted his teeth.  “Dammit, Screenface!  When I get outta here I’m gonna bust you and the Purple Pussy!”

Screenface glanced over at Markéta through his screeny demeanor and they both laughed.  “Oh, Officer Bates, that is where you are so wrong!  I have it on good authority…MY AUTHORITY…that you will never be leaving this place!”
“What are you talkin’ about?!?”  Bates struggled in his bonds as he felt his strength coming back to him.

“Now do not get alarmed, but I told you that this hideout was compromised, and that I would destroy it.”  Another suited man entered the room with a tray that held two champagne glasses.  In the other hand he held a bottle of wine, which he poured for Screenface and Markéta.  Screenface slipped the wine glass under his screeny covering and took a sip.  “This entire building is already rigged to explode.  I just need to press a button.”

“What’re ya waiting on then?!?  Explodin’ has gotta be better than watchin’ ya drink wine with your bimbo there!”

“NO!” Screenface shouted and began to move towards Bates.  Markéta held him back.  “You will NOT talk about Markéta that way!  She is quite a remarkable woman, and very talented!”

Bates retorted.  “Yeah, I bet she is!  With that outfit, I bet she can do all sorts of things that’d land her in jail!”

“Ticho!”  Markéta stepped between Screenface and Bates.  She pointed a finger at the officer.  “Silence I say, you stupid American!”

“Ohh, so you’re a foreign chick, huh?  I should’a known a world class villain like Screenface would have an international girlfriend!  Where’d you two meet, on an online dating site?”

Markéta got closer to Bates, and then reached around and pulled a long whip from some unknown location on her skintight cat suit.  “Silence!  I am Markéta, from Czech Republic, and my talents lie in torture of man!”  She then snapped the whip through the air to her right, nearly smacking one of the suited men with it!

Screenface interjected.  “You see, Markéta’s talent is that she is the finest of her country when it comes to torture.  Be thankful you have no information we need, and that you are going to explode, Bates!  Markéta would not be as painless!  So let me tell you how this is going to go down.  We will wait here until the return of the Manly Man.  Once he arrives, we will capture him and you will both go BOOM while SCREENFAACE and his company escape! HAHAHA!!

*This story takes place after Assassination Attempt pt. 12 and during the Dealing with the Dupes storyline

NEXT:  BEFORE THE BOOM
WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 23, 2015

All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2015 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work

are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental


NOW CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE MR. PEEPERS CHARACTER!!

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip
First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!
$2.99 plus shipping!  For Mature Readers.



 


Also available for purchase: the Peeper #7 for only 50 cents!
All-new issue of the comedy newsletter for August 2015
Features Mr. Peepers' trip to the Tilted Kilt & Billy G's KFC Investigation!





















SKETCH CARD COMMISSIONS
Now taking Sketch Card Commissions at Awerty Studio
Check out MUSIC VIDEO MONTH featuring music video themed sketch cards!

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

New Ink Pitt--The Female Factor

New Ink Pitt--Secret Signals pt. 1 of 2: “The Female Factor”
Markéta Appears!

Officer Bates and Screenface lay emotional on the floor of the concrete room.  The “Gay” Gas continued to rise, filling the room with a pink smoke.  Screenface was still crying and going on about how he wished he’d been nicer to his enemies, while Bates was growling in pain at his “female” cramps.

BZZZZZZZT!  A strange static was suddenly heard.

“Urggghh…what….is that?”  Bates grasped his stomach as he lay on his side, nearly in the fetal position.

Screenface sobbed, “It’s…it’s my transmitter!”

Bates forgot his pain for a moment.  “What?”

“My transmitter.  In my tooth.  It’s what I used to contact my men…oh my men!  It will be soo good to see them again!  They’ll help me out of here and then I’ll make them a nice meal and give them raises!”

“You’ve…got a…urgghh…radio transmitter in your t-tooth?  Why d-didn’t ya use it sooner?”

Screenface sighed between sobs.  “I told you earlier that this room prevents me from contacting my men, but only because the outside is incased in lead!  When the Manly Man continued to open the door, I was able to flick my tongue against the transmitter and send a distress signal!”

The static began to build.  “I’m picking up a signal again…which means the door is open!”  Screenface looked through the pink smoke towards the doorway.  It was difficult to see but the sound of the metal door sliding open against the concrete confirmed his conclusion.  Screenface strained to see his rescuers through the pink smoke.  Officer Bates rose up slightly from the floor and looked as well.  The silhouette of a figure appeared in the pink smoke, and the clicking of heels on the concrete was heard as it moved closer.  The figure finally emerged from the smoke and stood before Bates and Screenface.  Bates was astonished to see that their rescuer was a slender yet muscled blonde woman in a blue catsuit!  Screenface attempted to stand and address the woman.

“Hello, Markéta!”

*This story takes place after Assassination Attempt pt. 12 and during the Dealing with the Dupes storyline

NEXT:  PLANS FOR MANLY MAN
WEDNESDAY SEPTEMBER 9, 2015

All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2015 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work

are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental


NOW CELEBRATING 10 YEARS OF THE MR. PEEPERS CHARACTER!!

Purchase Mr. Peepers and the Peepspace Season 1!  
Collects all 24 pages of the Season 1 comic strip
First appearance of the comic strip version of Mr. Peepers!
$2.99 plus shipping!  For Mature Readers.



 


Also available for purchase: the Peeper #7 for only 50 cents!
All-new issue of the comedy newsletter for August 2015
Features Mr. Peepers' trip to the Tilted Kilt & Billy G's KFC Investigation!





















SKETCH CARD COMMISSIONS
Now taking Sketch Card Commissions at Awerty Studio
Check out MUSIC VIDEO MONTH featuring music video themed sketch cards!