New Ink Pitt--Haunted House of Doom: "The Videos" pt. 2

Originally posted on my first blog, on October 30, 2010

New Ink Pitt--Haunted House of Doom: "The Videos" 2 of 2

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING VIDEOS CONTAIN MATURE SUBJECT MATTER NOT MEANT FOR ALL AUDIENCES

Wilbur Hydrick's Horror in the Cornfield


Rufus the Retard is excited about the Haunted House!


She Peepers: Scariest Bitch in the Haunted House of Doom!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Peepers Pitt--Train Ride

Where is Choo Choo now?

Peepers' Pitt--New Crew Askew pt. 3 of 20: “Train Ride”
Choo Choo Andrews rolled side to side. His eyes opened to find that he was laying on a cot in what looked like a passenger compartment on a train. The cot vibrated, confirming that he was in fact, on a moving train. Andrews grew hopeful, thinking that he had finally found the train that Peepers had promised, and now he’d be going home! Then he remembered Peepers’ statement that what they had been doing was against his will, and his plans to correct it! Suddenly, Choo Choo heard a loud squawking from the hall. He opened the door of his passenger compartment and saw Birdy Nok Nok jumping around and trying to fly in the close quarters of the train! Apparently, Mr. Peepers had decided to pair up Choo Choo the railroad man and Birdy Nok Nok the bird man!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Shit Pitt--Wedding Reception

Will the reception end with a bang?

Shit Pitt--Bridle Vows pt. 5 of 5: “Wedding Reception”
Coach Spurrier was wasted. After finally marrying the love of his life, Snigger the Horse, the pair rode off into the woods to meet up with some of Spurrier’s friends for the wedding reception! Spurrier had pulled out a bottle of his Gamey Garnet Cockwine and had begun sipping it as the journey began. By the time they reached their destination, Spurrier was drunk, and ready to party!

Spurrier lay on his back, sprawled across the back of his new bride! Amazingly, he had yet to fall off of Snigger’s back in this position, and still held his bottle of Gamey Cockwine!

“Hells yeah I’s married! M-me and this h-hear horseisss married woooo hoo! N-now--URP--befores Sniggers and I’s consummates the marriage, we’s gon parteee like there’s no t-tomorrow!!”

Snigger stood with the drunken Spurrier on his back, in the middle of a clearing. Nearby was a fire, which was surrounded by Spurrier’s buddies. They included some of his notable football players such as Conner Squaw, Markus Laddermore, and even the recently released Steven Gardia! Former football player Christopher Smellypants also showed up, eating beans and passing gas on people. They were all drinking and doing stupid things. Eventually, Farmer Brown showed up with some more farm animals like Snigger, and Smellypants chased a pig into a bush and did who knows what with it! The cheerleaders were also at the reception, and laid out on the grass and let the football players take turns like they often do after football practice at the Willy Rice Stadium!

A great time was being had by all…that is, until a gunshot rang out and a bullet whizzed past the drunken Spurrier’s head! Spurrier looked upside down with glazed eyes towards the sound. He saw the Rosewood Cowboy standing at the edge of the clearing, with his pistol ready!



Purchase a copy of the Hand Held Hotties mini comic and support this blog! This issue features Mr. Peepers, who comments on a group of hotties that are displayed in pin-up format. Get it now for only $1.00! Created, written, and drawn by Joshua Dyson

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Disagreements Dissolved

Rachel will end the argument!

New Ink Pitt--Lenny the Mormon pt. 3 of 5: “Disagreements Dissolved”
“NO RACHEL NO! AYE WILL NOT!” Lenny the Leprechaun yelled loudly.
“AYE will NOT go with this re-…Rufus on this trip ye speak of! Me place is here with ye and our unborn chile!”

Rachel looked down at Lenny as he stood in the middle of her living room with his arms crossed. She knew that he would be opposed to the idea of accompanying Rufus as a “guest” on his mission to become a Mormon priest. However, she also knew that any argument he could make would not be able to counter the conclusion she had come to.

“Lenny, you have to understand. This is best for us all. In order for us to ever be a family, you have to do this.”

“NO NO NO! LENNY NOT…COME W-WITH ME, MOMMEE! HE NOT ‘LLOWED CUZ HE BAD BAD BAD!!” Rufus spouted his words between large mouthfuls of the last chocolate bar Rachel had given him. The retard spat chocolate all over the dining room table as he spoke.

“Now, Rufus, you KNOW what Mommee told you! You are going to be a good boy and agree to this! I want Lenny to go so he can take care of you!”

Lenny’s eyes grew big. “What the green hell?!? There is no way aye am going to take care of this re-”

Rachel gave Lenny a stern look, and all opposition he had to the whole concept faded. He knew that, with that one look, Rachel was telling him that if he didn’t go with Rufus, then she would be parting ways with him forever.

“Ok, ok…Aye’ll do it!”



Purchase a copy of the Sammie Star mini comic and support this blog! Who is Sammie Star and why is he/she called the Androgynous Anomaly? Find out more about the character in this issue now for only $1.00! Created, Written, and Drawn by Joshua Dyson

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Haunted House of Doom: The Videos pt. 1

Originally posted on my first blog, on October 30, 2010

New Ink Pitt--Haunted House of Doom: "The Videos" 1 of 2


Trodemus introduces the Haunted House of Doom to his guests!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Shit Pitt--Bridle Vows Wedding Footage

Shit Pitt--Bridle Vows Wedding Footage Coach Spurrier finally got married to Snigger the Horse today! Here is some exclusive footage from the wedding ceremony!


Spurrier at the Altar!


Spurrier says his vows!


Spurrier says I do!


Snigger Responds


Kiss the Bride!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Peepers' Pitt--Snowy Plain

Humphrey doesn't like the "W" word!

Peepers' Pitt--New Crew Askew pt. 2 of 20: “Snowy Plain”
Humphrey the Hunchback Hobo shivered. He opened his eyes to find himself surrounded by whiteness. It was not the white light that had come from the giant apparition of Mr. Peepers back in the city however. No, this whiteness was cold, wet, and flaky. Humphrey was surrounded by…snow! He leapt to his feet, moving more quickly that he ever does. Humphrey knew that snow was not a good thing since he had slept out in such conditions many times before as a homeless man back on his own world. He wanted shelter, but there was none to be found in any direction! There was not a single structure or tree anywhere! Humphrey wondered how such a thing was possible. Then, he heard the crunching sound of footsteps on the snow behind him.

Humphrey turned to see Boris, the Russian solider, walking towards him. He stopped a few feet away from Humphrey, and put his hands on his hips. It appeared that the cold had no effect on him!

“Pree veet, Comrade! Is it not beautiful weather we are having?”

Humphrey glanced up at the tall Russian from his hunched over stance.
“Was w’ong with you? I’s a cold! It FREEZIN’ out here, man! We’s gots ta find shelter!”

Boris smiled. “Nonsense! No shelter is needed for one such as I! We shall go and find work!”

At the sound of the word, “work,” Humphrey flipped out! “WHAT?!? ARE YOU CRAZY, MAN? NO NO NO! I’s not w-w…do anything!”

Mr. Peepers, invisible to the pair, floated nearby. He liked what he was seeing. Maybe Humphrey would finally do something interesting!


In addition to writing this blog, I also draw caricatures! I am taking orders now! Contact me at awerty7@hotmail.com for more info.

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.