Betram Bunny's Announcement

Shit Pitt--Betram Bunny's Announcement

All characters, stories, and performances are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Curvaceous Compression

New Ink Pitt--The Haunting of Doom pt. 3 of 5 : “Curvaceous Compression”

“OH YES BELINDA! THAT FEELS SO GOOD!”

Trodemus, Prophet of Doom lay face down in his bed. His big beautiful woman, Belinda, sat on top of him, massaging his back. Trodemus had removed his cloak, with the exception of the cowl. Trodemus smiled from all the pleasure he was receiving!

“Mmm, Belinda! Give me more pressure!”

Belinda was completely naked! She straddled the Prophet of Doom with wonderful curves that were the envy of all other forms in the room! Her huge, rounded breasts cascaded from her body like drops of water down a mountainside. As she leaned over, they hung in “u” shapes before splashing into the back of Trodemus and expanding outward in sexiness from the force. Belinda now lay completely on top of Trodemus’ body, pressing him into the mattress with her weight!

“Yes Belinda! That’s it! Yesss!!”

Trodemus and Belinda lay there silently for a bit, savoring the moment. Doom was really into the “curvaceous compression” that his lady love was supplying and felt wonderful! This freaky action was something the couple did often, and in varying positions, but always with Belinda on top! It allowed Trodemus to think, and come up with solutions to his problems. His biggest problem was the ghost that had been haunting him. He’d seen it in their room minutes ago, but it quickly disappeared! Belinda pointed out a white towel on a nearby chair and suggested that perhaps Doom had been seeing things. Trodemus felt that such a thing was possible, but he knew what he saw! The ghost was there, and he was intent on finding it and making it explain itself!

“I know what I will do! Blacktoes and I will have another séance! We will force the ghost out of hiding!”

Belinda kissed Doom on the neck and then the cheek. “Ooo baby, I knew you’d come up with a plan! You are such a wonderful man, and I’m sure you’ll take care of that mean old ghost for good! Right now though, I want you to…”

What Belinda said at that point was a private matter, but their actions in the next moment gave away the gist of it. Trodemus turned around in the bed and Belinda climbed into position. As the two made passionate love on the bed, they did not notice a small shaft of light appear in the gap of the closed bathroom door and floor, or the sound of running water in the tub!

All characters, stories, and performances
are (C) 2012 Joshua Dyson
Photo by Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Levitating Lewdness

New Ink Pitt--The Haunting of Doom pt. 2 of 5: "Levitating Lewdness"

The Prophet of Doom rose up in bed to face the outline of the ghost before him, using his telekinetic power to lift himself up in the air! Trodemus was now levitating about six inches above his mattress, and was on level with the ghost. Below him, Belinda lay sleeping soundly.

“GHOST!” Trodemus yelled loudly, forgetting his lady love was still asleep. “Do you know who it is that you torment?” Trodemus stared at the floating white outline that was in the shape of a traditional white sheet ghost. When the ghost did not reply, Doom became angry, and decided to let it know exactly who it was dealing with.

“I have seen the future and know what is to come! As sure as the sun rises and sets, the Prophet knows and NEVER forgets! I am…TRODEMUS, PROPHET OF DOOM!” Still no reply came from the ghost.

“You would do well to leave this place, for I, Trodemus, am a being of immense power, in tune with the supernatural! I shall banish you by force with my otherwordly powers if necessary, and cause you much pain! Take heed, Spirit! It is no mere mortal you face in Trodemus, Prophet of Doom!”

Below Doom, Belinda stirred. She wiped her eyes and let out a huge yawn before looking up.

“Troddie, what ya doing up there?”
“Silence, Belinda! The Prophet of Doom is in conversation with a ghost! You will heed my demands, Spirit!”
“Whatever you say, Troddie. Hehe”
“What are you giggling at, woman!?”
“Troddie, you should probably look down. I see your supernatural…parts!”

Trodemus turned to look down to realize that his parts were indeed showing since Belinda was looking straight up his cloak! He fumbled with his hands to cover himself.

“No Troddie, don’t! I’m enjoying the view! Love it when you give the supernatural orders! Makes you a really big man mmmmm!!”

Trodemus smiled. “Not now, Belinda! Can’t you see I’m in conflict with this gh--” As Trodemus turned to face the ghost once more, he realized it was gone! He floated back down and lay beside Belinda, puzzled.

“Where’d it go?”
“Where’d what go?” Belinda asked.
“The ghost! It was just right there--glowing bright as day! Didn’t you see it?”
Belinda smirked. “I didn’t see anything, honey. I’ll take your word for it though. I know you’re in touch with the supernatural, however…” She then pointed at a white towel laid across a chair near the bed. “…maybe you just need to relax.”

All characters, stories, and performances
are (C) 2012 Joshua Dyson
Photo by Joshua Dyson and Kristen Whitehead

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Troubled Thoughts

New Ink Pitt--The Haunting of Doom pt. 1 of 5: "Troubled Thoughts"

Trodemus lay in bed, beside his lady love, Belinda, the bbw. A wild night of romance with Belinda had made him temporarily forget his troubles.

As Belinda lay sound asleep, Trodemus remained wide awake. His mind revisted the questions that he had yet to answer. The dream that predicted the end of his business had now taken shape in the physcial word, and despite his efforts, continued to haunt him. Death had appeared, and reaffirmed that the Prophet of Doom’s fortune-telling business would end. A ghost had also appeared at the Haunted House of Doom, though there had been no one playing one, and nothing under the sheet! Trodemus was not sure what was going on, but he still did not believe that his business could fall with all the profits he’d been making.

Trodemus then laughed at himself for being frightened of his financial future. He had earned too much money to let a bad dream and a few unexplained incidents worry him! Besides, he was Trodemus, the Prophet of Doom, an expert on “doom” and at facing down the supernatural! Whatever was going on, he felt confident that he would figure it out and defeat the cause! Trodemus was further inspired as he looked over at Belinda sleeping so peacefully.

Suddenly, some books fell off a nearby shelf! A white light then appeared, revealing the outline of what looked like the same ghost Doom had seen in the haunted house! Trodemus rose up in bed and readied himself to fight it!

All characters, stories, and performances
are (C) 2012 Joshua Dyson
Photo by Joshua Dyson and Kristen Whitehead

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

New Ink Pitt--Haunted House of Doom Aftermath

New Ink Pitt--Haunted House of Doom Aftermath

After the unexplained appearances of Death and what was seemingly a ghost in the Haunted House of Doom, Trodemus was irate! He was determined to find the source of these distractions, and punish whoever was behind them for interrupting his show!

Trodemus gathered his Haunted House of Doom players to question them. Wilbur Hydrick, She-Peepers, Potbellied Ninja, and the Dark Cat stood before him, just inside the entrance to the Haunted House of Doom. Rufus the Retard had already left, after telling Trodemus that he was afraid of the dark! Belinda walked in last, still dressed in a tight-fitting witch costume that showed off her cleavage! Trodemus smiled at his lady love and then began his interrogation.

An hour of interrogation proved useless, since all the players said they saw nothing. Only Trodemus had seen the ghost and Death. Trodemus suspected foul play, but he had no way to prove it. Finally, he paid Wilbur and She-Peepers and sent them on their way. He then took Belinda by the hand and beckoned to his servants, the Potbellied Ninja and Dark Cat, to follow them into the Haunted House of Doom. The four of them searched the entire Haunted House for any signs of an explanation to what Doom saw. They turned up nothing.

Later, Trodemus sat in his office back at his Psychic Parlor of Doom, troubled by what he‘d seen. Death seemed real, but there had to be some other explanation. The real Death wasn’t a liar, but this “Death” had said that Doom’s business would fail. Trodemus knew that such a statement could not be true, since his recent improvements of his fortune-telling business, along with the Haunted House of Doom venture had made him very wealthy! The “ghost” that appeared was also troubling. What did it mean? Why did it appear and what was its purpose in all this? Trodemus’ frustration faded however, as Belinda walked in. She wore one of Trodemus’ black robes, and was smiling at him. A moment later, she removed the robe to reveal her naked, vuluptous body! Trodemus quickly left his seat and his troubles behind to embrace his lady love, Belinda the bbw!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2012 Jon Hason & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Shit Pitt--Back at the Farm

Shit Pitt--Showdown for Snigger Aftermath: “Back at the Farm”

The Rosewood Cowboy returned to the place where Spurrier had his wedding reception party. He arrived, riding on the back of Snigger, who had now regained his senses. They had left Spurrier soaked in urine and defeated back at the hotel.

Johnny Pizzazz, Optic Ink Eye, Betram Bunny, and Vinnie Love (along with the two cheerleaders from earlier) greeted him. The group had put an end to the reception and sent all the attendees home, including Connor Squaw, Markus Laddermore, and Chris Smellypants. The Cowboy rode up to Pizzazz and looked him in the eye.

“It’s over. Spurrier won’t mess with Snigger no more. Ah made sure of it!" Snigger neighed in agreement with his master.

Pizzazz questioned him. “What did you do? You didn’t ki--”

“Naw! Didn’t do him in like he deserved, but we sure as hell stuck it to him! Snigger is getting a divorce, and gonna take that low down varmit fer all he’s worth!”

The Cowboy smiled without saying another word, as he and Snigger trotted off back towards their farm. Pizzazz and the others followed. Around thirty minutes later, they arrived at the farm. The Cowboy walked to his front porch and hitched Snigger to a rail there. He then fed him some oats and rubbed his back to let him know that all was right again. The Cowboy then went inside his house, only to find an unconscious Reverend Reynolds laid out on the living room floor!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2012 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Shit Pitt--Spurrier Snagged

Shit Pitt--Showdown for Snigger pt. 5 of 5: “Spurrier Snagged”

Coach Spurrier was on the run. Snigger, his equine bride, had regained his senses and was free of whatever mind control the Coaxing Coach had held over him! Spurrier ran as hard as he could, but a quick glance behind revealed a galloping Snigger, who appeared mad as hell and nearly upon him!

A moment later and Spurrier was caught! Snigger used his teeth to latch onto Spurrier’s head of hair, which was the only thing to grab since the coach was still buck naked! Snigger pulled Spurrier back with savage force, stopping his pursuit instantly!

“YEOWWWW!!” Spurrier cried in pain at his hair being pulled, as the old coach hoped that none of it would get pulled out! He had only made it about five yards from the hotel, which was not a good sign for a football coach! Snigger stood with Spurrier’s hair in his mouth, and awaited his true master, the Rosewood Cowboy!

“Ow! Ow! Ow! Lemme go, damn it!” Spurrier squirmed, but not too much, as the pain was bringing him to tears. The Rosewood Cowboy then walked up, carrying his boot full of urine.

“It’sall over, Spurrier! Yew done lost! Smellin’ mah piss will make anybody, ‘specially mah horse, get their senses back! Yew is gonna pay for stealin’ Snigger from me, yew dirty varmit, yew!” The Cowboy pulled his pistol from its holster and pointed it at Spurrier. “Now, yew got any last words?”

Spurrier was now crying in fear. “Don’t shoot me, Cowboy! Ah’m sorry! I ain’t never gonna mess with Snigger again! He’s just such a fine horse that ah got jealous! Ah had ta have him!”

The Cowboy cocked his gun. “No more talk about Snigger! Make peace with yer maker!” Spurrier went on about how he was sorry and cried and pleaded with the Cowboy to spare him.

“Relax. Ah ain’t gonna kill yew! Got a better idea--yew know what it is, Snigger?” Snigger neighed in agreement. “Spurrier, yew done married mah horse, but yew ain’t gonna have him! Yew is married though, and that means Snigger is gon take yew fer all yer worth in the DIVORCE!! Still, that don’t mean ah ain’t gonna get me some early payback!” The Cowboy then tipped the boot in Spurrier’s direction, tossing his urine all over the coach!

All characters, stories, photos, and performances
are (C) 2012 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.