Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Peepers' Pitt--Awake from Battle

Peepers’ Pitt--Stranded with Strangers pt. 12 of 12:  “Awake from Battle” 
Pizzazz & Humphrey vs Trodemus & Birdy
Birdy Nok Nok careened downwards into the alley.  Trodemus struggled to hang on as he sat upon the bird man’s back. Trodemus’ teledeception had made Birdy Nok Nok furious with Johnny Pizzazz, and that is who he targeted first.  He swooped down low and nearly grazed Pizzazz with his sharp beak!  Humphrey ran for cover behind his trash can.

“How do you like my protégé, Johnny Pizzazz?” Trodemus gloated.  “His name is Birdy Nok Nok, and he’s very angry with you!”

Birdy made another downwards swoop at Pizzazz, and managed to knock his hat off!  “Trodemus, what are you doing?”

“The Prophet of Doom has seen the future and he knows what is to come!  Trodemus is going to be $1,000 richer now that he’s started this fight that Peepers demanded!”

Pizzazz recovered his hat, and grabbed his microphone.  “Didn’t know that Peepers required us to fight to win the money!  Don’t forget, Trodemus, that I am the Mage of the Age, the Maestro of Magic, the Catalyst of Character….JOHNNY PIZZAZZ!”

Before Pizzazz could act, Trodemus used his telekinesis to shove the magician up against the brick wall of the alley.

“Can’t have you using any of your magic, Pizzazz!  The Prophet of Doom knows you, and knows the tricks you have up your sleeves!”  Birdy then landed and Trodemus got off his back.  The birdman ran over to the trapped Pizzazz in a fit of squawking anger!  Birdy took one sideways glance at Pizzazz, and then began to randomly peck the wall around him!

“Trodemus!  What is he doing?”

Trodemus smiled.  “I think he’s trying to kill you!  Peepers wanted Birdy bad, and now, thanks to the Prophet of Doom, he’s the baddest bird man here!”

Pizzazz tried to move as the pecks of Birdy’s beak came closer to different areas of his body.  “Why?!?”

“I want to win that money, Pizzazz!  I can use it to spruce up the psychic parlor and take Belinda out for a night on the town!  I can also use it to fund my new reality show, TRODEMUS: SEEKER OF SPECTRES!”

“No! Why is Birdy trying to kill me?!?”

“Oh.  Well in order to make him bad, I used my teledeception to show him images of you trying to attack him!”

Pizzazz struggled to move, but he could not.  He looked over at the trash can to see Humphrey cowering behind.  Pizzazz stared into his eyes, and was able to finally motivate the hobo into action!

“Hey! You’s leave my fren Johnny Pizzazz alone!”  Humphrey stood up from behind the trash can.  “Birdy!  Wha you doin’?”

Birdy Nok Nok saw Humphrey and instantly remembered his friend.  He stopped pecking at Pizzazz and looked confused.  Trodemus saw his hold on Birdy slipping, so he projected more false images into his mind, and this time the images were of Humphrey attacking!  Birdy squawked and flapped his wings to strike at Humphrey, but accidentally struck Trodemus, knocking him into the brick wall!  Pizzazz was then able to move again, and had to act fast to use his magic to help Humphrey!  Birdy lunged forward to attack the hobo.  Pizzazz pulled his magic wand from his hat and shot sparks at Birdy.  The sparks caused Birdy great fright, and he lost his sense of direction.  He came crashing down near Humphrey’s trash can.

Trodemus gathered himself to find Pizzazz standing over him with his wand pointed in his face.  Humphrey came walking up beside him.

“Let me introduce my protégé.”  Pizzazz stood over the fallen pair.  “His name is Humphrey the hob--”

Before Pizzazz could finish his sentence, Trodemus used his telekinesis to knock the wand from the Maestro of Magic’s hand.  It flew back into the alley behind Birdy.

“The Prophet of Doom WILL have that money!”  He then pushed Pizzazz and Humphrey up against the wall with his seemingly growing telekinetic power!  “He will have that money and he will leave here as soon as possible!  Doom has had quite enough of this place!”

Suddenly, Birdy Nok Nok flew up at Trodemus.  His recognition of Humphrey had either freed him from Trodemus, or made him crazier!  The bird man flapped his wings and hovered above him, between downward strikes with his beak.  Doom waved his hands to get him to move away.  Finally, he used his telekinesis to shove Birdy out of the air and toss him back into the alley where he crashed into Humphrey’s trash can.

“Now, The Prophet of Doom is going to give Peepers the most exciting show he’s ever seen!  He’s going to use his teledeception power to confuse the three of you so thoroughly that you’ll be fighting each other!  While you are trying to kill each other, Doom will be counting his cash!”  Trodemus then began to project images into the minds of Humphrey and Pizzazz.  Even if they were too smart for the deception, they would still be confused as to who was where, and who was trying to strike!  Pizzazz saw the fist of Humphrey coming at him.  He was unable to move, and was struck hard.  The deception had quickly become truth!  Pizzazz did not want to fight back, as he knew he’d be hitting Humphrey and continuing the pointless fight.  He was then sliced across the arm by the beak of Birdy Nok Nok!  Trodemus laughed as he watched the pair working Pizzazz over!  Pizzazz thought for a way out of this, and he suddenly remembered the Cowboy’s reform technique.  It was a type of mental resistance to mind control.  It had helped them against Shithead, and Pizzazz hoped it would work here.  All he had to do was get down on all fours…and bark!

Pizzazz dropped to his knees to the puzzlement of Trodemus.  Once on all fours, the Mage of the Age began to bark like a dog.  Trodemus’ eyes grew big.  Such behavior was surely uncharacteristic of Pizzazz, but Trodemus did not care.  Perhaps it was strange reaction to the teledeception?  When Humphrey and Birdy also got down on all fours and began barking, Trodemus lost all sense of what was going on.  Further attempts at teledeception proved useless.  Also, his telekinesis had somehow ceased to work!  The powerless Prophet of Doom just stood there as Pizzazz, Humphrey, and Birdy finally got up from the ground.

“What the hell was that?” Trodemus demanded.

Pizzazz smiled.  “Some mental resistance a good friend taught me.”

Doom frowned.  “Barking like a dog?”

“I can’t explain it, but it works.  Guess this means we win!”

Peepers suddenly appeared with his full body once more visible after appearing as only a floating head for so long.  He clapped his hands in applause at what he’d just witnessed…

NEXT:  THE PERFECT WOMAN!
WEDNESDAY, MAY 14, 2014
 THE PITT REPORT UPDATES EVERY WEDNESDAY 
  • GET A 4-ISSUE SUBSCRIPTION TO THE PEEPER NEWSLETTER!  Featuring Mr. Peepers and company, as they visit, report on, and comically assault real locations and events!  Available in pdf format by email or in print by postal mail!  Issue #4 available now!
Newsletter Versions
 
 


All characters, stories, photos, drawings, and performances
are (C) 2014 Joshua Dyson & Crevice Creations

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

No comments:

Post a Comment