Shit Pitt--Sermon on Hate

Will the Daddy of Dislike turn from hatred?


Shit Pitt--Shitfall--Suitable Sermons pt. 1 of 3: "Sermon on Hate”

Recently, the Reverend Reynolds stopped the Rosewood Cowboy in his effort to tie up the “loose ends” of the Shitwar by shooting the jailed Shitlings! Since that time, the Reverend Reynolds has made progress in reforming some of the Shitlings, which now includes Carnastas the Clown and Ronnie Slickbottom. Also, the Good Reverend was able to restore the disfigured face of Betram, the Bisexual Bunny!

The Reverend Reynolds was pleased. The results of his revival had been very faith-affirming, with the changes in Carnastas, Slickbottom, and Betram! The Good Reverend was ready to shout out in excitement as he approached the podium for yet another sermon to the Shitlings. His joy was countered when his eyes met with the faces of those who remained oppressed. Before him sat Bennie Hate, Doctor Dyson, and Gwala the Zombie! Such a sad-looking crowd would dampen the spirits of any average man! The Reverend Reynolds was no average man, however, as he held firmly to his faith in the Good Word! Those before him had been hard to reach, but now he was equipped with a way to cross that divide and share with these hardened Shitlings the truth! Reverend Reynolds planned to customize his new sermons to fit each individual. He would give “Suitable Sermons!” His first target was Bennie Hate!

The Reverend Reynolds got down from his podium, pulled up a chair, and sat right in front of the “Daddy of Dislike,” twin brother of Vinnie Love, and delivered a sermon on hate! The Good Reverend looked into the fiery eyes of the hate monger, and told the story of hate groups such as the KKK and the Nazi party. He talked of how powerful they were, and how their methods had allowed them to conquer many who stood in their way! Their hatred had fueled them to be successful in their lives. Reynolds then pulled the rug out from under Bennie Hate by asking what his hatred had gotten him. When Bennie didn’t answer, the Reverend responded to his own question by saying, “nothing.” Bennie’s hate had gotten him nothing. He was master of no one and no thing. Reynolds said Bennie’s hatred only existed because of his jealously of his more successful brother, Vinnie Love! Out of jealously, Bennie had become the polar opposite of his brother, in order to gain some since of fame! Reynolds said this motivation had made Bennie a bitter fool, and he would be better off giving love a chance! Bennie refused, got up and walked to the back of the room. Reynolds felt he had made an impression, and went back to his podium, finishing the sermon. No one was converted, but Reynolds knew it was only a matter of time! His suitable sermons would strike a personal chord with each Shitling, and in the end, they would surrender to the light!

All characters, stories, and performances
are (C) 2011 Joshua Dyson

All characters appearing in this work
are fictitious. Any resemblance to real
persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.